#I love gaius's chambers SO MUCH

[adhd-merlin]

I would so watch a series that's just merlin and gaius going about their lives. arthur is there, but it ain't about him. he makes an appeareance now and then as the comic relief guy. the series is part procedural/part sit-com. merlin and gaius investigate to solve the magical mystery of the week. gwen is merlin's best buddy and occasional helper, but he still has to keep his magic a secret around her (she finds out at some point, of course). gaius's errands in the lower town set up the episode's subplot. he has a friend who keeps getting her chickens stolen or something. she thinks there's sorcery involved. she's right. it's the fearsome chicken-stealing Cockatrice, a creature of legend impossible to defeat. unless

[insanusnavicularis]

I just had a dream and hear me out okay? Noble George.

It’d be something like:

Merlin, barging into Arthur’s chambers: yOU WON’T BELIEVE WHAT I JUST FOUND OUT

Arthur: …What did you find, Merlin?

Merlin: George. GEORGE.

Arthur: you found… George? The servant? Was he lost?

Merlin: THATS THE THING! George! The servant! Right? Right?!?!

Arthur: uh- have you hit your head? Please tell me you don’t actually have a mental affliction.

Merlin: George! The servant! The servant who loves polishing and sweeping and- and I don’t even know, doing laundry I guess? And brass!

Arthur: okay, Merlin, you’re starting to worry me, you either calm yourself down or I call Gaius.

Merlin: calm down? He’s not actually a servant, Arthur!

Arthur: what- what does that even mean?

Merlin: it means, Arthur, he’s a noble.

Arthur: what.

Merlin: he’s a noble, Arthur! An actual, royal, noble! Like with- with the lands and, I don’t know what, the riches and- he should have servants! But he is one.

Arthur: I’m gonna be real with you, I don’t know what you’re talking about. What do you mean he’s a noble? He’s a servant! Has been a servant here for- since I was a kid.

Merlin: for since you were a kid?

Arthur: for since I was a kid! Yeah! He is not a noble Merlin, why would he be a servant here if he was?

Merlin: That’s the thing! Look- just hear me out, okay? I was in the library doing research on magic when I stumbled upon a book with all the noble families of the whole kingdom, okay? And don’t ask how I found it, but suddenly there it was! Name and surname and all: George! So then I asked Geoffrey and he confirmed it was OUR George. Apparently Geoffrey knew the whole time!

Arthur: what-

Merlin: so then I obviously went to interrogate ask George what was going on, and he confirmed it! Didn’t even try to deny it! He said it wasn’t supposed to be a secret anymore.

Arthur, getting invested, eating popcorn: what does that even mean?

Merlin: he told me that being a servant has been his dream since he was little. When he was a kid he was always running after the servants in his household and trying to help them and learn from them but his father didn’t like that because he said it was below his station or some other classist shit.

Arthur, eyes wide: omg story time.

Merlin: anyways fast forward to when he was fifteen summers, he decided he was going to make a life for himself and follow his dreams so he ran away at night leaving only a note behind that explained the situation. He went from city to city until he reached Camelot and his dream finally came true and he became a servant. He didn’t tell anyone he was a noble because he didn’t want to be treated differently or be sent back to his father.

Arthur, in the edge of his seat: wow.

Merlin: wow indeed.

Arthur: wait- why did he tell you then? If he didn’t want anyone to know?

Merlin: he said he didn’t think it’d be a problem now with how much time has passed and all. I asked him if I could tell everyone and he said that as long as it didn’t interfere with his duties he couldn’t care less, so I ran here and told you.

Arthur: wow.

[larluce]

Arthur and Merlin travel back in time without knowing the other is from the future too AU

LINKS TO THE OTHER PARTS OF THIS AU HERE: PART 1 , PART 2 , PART 3 , PART 4 , PART 5 , PART 6 , PART 7 , PART 8 , PART 9 , PART 10 , PART 11 , PART 12 , PART 13 , PART 14 , PART 15 , PART 16 , PART 17 , PART 18 , PART 19 , PART 20 , PART 21 , PART 22 , PART 23 , PART 24 , PART 25 , PART 26 , PART 27 , PART 28 , PART 29 (You're here), PART 30

Gaius: (sighs) My boy, I don't think crying for your life to the King is going to work.

Merlin: Is not him I'm going to cry to.

Gaius: ...

Merlin: I know, I know. This is so absur-

Gaius: Brilliant! 😃 How didn't I think of this before? (quickly looks for some medicine and gives it to Merlin) Here, a couple of drops in your eyes should be enough.

Merlin: I can't believe you're really supporting this madness.

Gaius: Madness is what Arthur will do if you don't change his mind soon. (starts pushing Merlin out of his chambers) Now go, I can't keep the King assleep much longer. (ends to push Merlin outside and closes the door)

Meanwhile in Arthur's Chambers.

Arthur: (on his desk with a bunch of parchments with names, strategies and possible scenarios, thinking) This was not supposed to happen so soon. I had I plan goddamit! (sinks his face in his hands) Why father? Why do you always want to take away everyone I love? First Gwen and now...(sighs and gets the hands off his face) I hate you, so much... but I don't want to kill you. I don't want to do any of this, but I have to. You'd do the same for my mother. I hope you understand, because even now I can't bare the thought of you not forgiving me.

Merlin: (enters hanging his head)

Arthur: (letting out his frustration) May I know where have you been? 😡 This room is not going to clean itself. I have a lot of work to do and you are-

Merlin: (lifts his head to reveal two rivers of tears under his eyes, face red, hiccuping and whining)

Arthur: Merlin! (jumps from his sit and runs to Merlin, almost in panic) What is it?! Did something happen? (checks him, worried) Are you hurt?! Tell me!

Merlin: (thinking) Me eyes hurt! 🥺 Why does it have to burn this much? 😭(says) Please, Arthur, stop this! This is your fault! (hits Arthur's chest)

Arthur: What?! What did I do?! 😨

Merlin: (thinking) Shit, I did it backwards. (says) I mean, MY fault! (hits his chest) It's all my fault! (hits his chest harder) My fault, my fault!

Arthur: (very concern) Will you stop that?! You'll hurt yourself! Merlin! (grabs Merlin by the wrists) What's gotten into you?

Merlin: Please, Arthur. I can't-(thinking) Wait, I forgot to kneel. (drops to his knees)

Arthur: What the- 😨

Merlin: I can't live with myself if blood is spilled because of me! 😭 (tries to hold Arthur's hands, but can't see well through the tears so he ends up pulling his trousers in a crying mess)

Arthur: (definitely in panic now) What are you doing?! Merlin, stand up! My trousers are going to fall. Merlin! (kneels too and cups his face, comforting) I get that you're scared, but everything will turn out alright.

Merlin: (thinking) Nooo! It's not working! And I can't hug his legs now! (says) No! No! You have to stop this-Argh! (thinking) Damn it! It's burning too much! I can't open my eyes! (hides his face in his hands, pretending he's crying harder)

Arthur: (even more worried) Merlin look at me, please.

Merlin: (thinking) No! He'll realise I'm faking if I can't open my eyes. What do I do? What else was in Morgana's script? Oh, right! (says) If you do this, I… I'd rather… disappear! (faints dramatically)

Arthur: (catches him before he hits the floor in reflex) Merlin? (pats his face) Merlin! (shakes him) Merlin, open your eyes.

Merlin: (thinking) I can't. I fainted.

Arthur: Wake up, come on. Merlin! (Shakes him harder)

Merlin: (thinking) Ow! There is no need to be so rough. 😠

Arthur: (concern) He fainted.

Merlin: (thinking) Don't say!

Arthur: I need to take him to Gaius. (carries Merlin bridal style)

Merlin: (thinking) Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! why are you carrying me like this? 😳😫

Arthur: (Runs outside with Merlin in his arms and yelling) Gaius! (Runs through the castle staff) Everybody, get out of the way! It's an emergency! Gaius!

Merlin: (thinking) There's no need to be so dramatic either! 🤦‍♂️

In Gaius' Tower.

Arthur: (enters kicking the door open) Gaius!

Gaius: (looks Merlin in Arthur's arms, alarmed) What happened?!

Arthur: I don't know! He-

Gaius: Lay him on the bed first. I need to examine him.

Arthur: (Lays Merlin on the bed quickly)

Gaius: (while checking Merlin) Now explain.

Arthur: (paces, anxiously) He came to my chambers crying and saying that this was all his fault, hitting himself like a madman. Then he begged me to stop the rebel-the back up plan and he kneeled, Gaius, he KNEELED before me! When has he ever done that? I tried to calm him, but he just wouldn't stop crying! And then suddenly he fainted!

Merlin: (pinches Gaius subtly)

Gaius: (realices he's faking) I see... (gets an idea) Oh, my poor, poor boy.

Arthur: (stops pacing) What? What is it?

Gaius: It seems that Merlin is in a very bad state of... anxiety, Sire.

Arthur: Anxiety?

Gaius: Yes, that! He fainted from the anxiety. I know he doesn't show it always, Sire, but Merlin is very... sensitive. Sometimes his heart cannot bear strong impressions and, apparently, the approach of a rebellion was too much for his... delicate heart.

Merlin: (thinking, offended) That's not true! 😠

Arthur: (thinking, between concerned and confused) How can this be? Not even when his father died I've seen him so distraugh. Does the rebellion really worries him this much? (says) But he'll wake up, right? He'll be fine.

Gaius: He will, but I fear that... (dramatic pause)

Arthur: What? Tell me!

Gaius: If he continues receiving news that could cause him any anguish he could become seriously ill to the point his heart could... stop beating completely.

Merlin: (thinking) Really, Gaius? 🙄 What was the need of making up this diagnosis?

Arthur: (desperate) No... No! there must be something you can give him! Some medicine, a treatment, ANYTHING!

Gaius: The only thing that can help Merlin now is rest and tranquility. ABSOLUTE tranquility.

Arthur: (sinks in a chair nearby, filled with guilt) This is my fault, isn't it? He's like this because of me.

Merlin: (thinking) No, no, no. Don't think that! ☹️

Gaius: You had no way of knowing this would happen, Sire.

Arthur: What do I do now? If I keep up with my plan I lose him if I don't I lose him too. (looks up at gaius with watery eyes) I can't lose him, Gaius. (thinking) Not again, not again. Please.

Merlin: (thinking, his heart beating like crazy) He... He never cared for me like this in my other life. It feels... nice.

Gaius: (puts a comforting hand on Arthur's shoulder) Rebellion is not the only answer. You said yourself it was just a back up plan. You can still reason with the King or we can put Merlin safe somewhere.

Arthur: But he'll be away.

Gaius: But safe. Isn't that what's important?

Arthur: ...

Gaius: Whatever it is you'll do, I know you'll make the right decision, your Highness.

Arthur: (sighs, stands up, aproaches Merlin and caresses his hand lovinly)

Merlin: (tries very hard for his heart and breathing to stay even)

Arthur: Tell me when he wakes. I need to take care of some things.

Gaius: Of course, Sire.

Arthur: (gives a last look at Merlin and finally leaves)

Merlin: (sits up as soon as the door closes) What the hell was that?! 😡

Gaius: That was me saving us all.

Merlin: "Anxiety"? "delicate heart"? "his heart could stop beating completely"? There was no need to scare him like that!

Gaius: You are the one who decided to faint. Why did you do that?

Merlin: Morgana told me to.

Gaius: (in understanding) Morgana! I should've known it was her idea.

Merlin: Yes, the idea was to use tears to persuade Arthur of not doing the rebellion. This is outright lying to him! And you know I hate lying to him, Gaius! (rubs his eyes) Ugh, my eyes still burn a bit.

Gaius: This should help (gives him a bowl with water and Merlin starts washing his eyes). I'm sorry I lied to Arthur, but I figured that if he was doing this rebellion to save you, the only way to stop him was if he believed you'll be in danger if the rebellion were to happen too.

Merlin: (sighs) What's done is done. (gets off the bed)

Gaius: What are you doing?

Merlin: Going to do my chores.

Gaius: You can't! You are supposed to be ill. Remember?

Merlin: So what? You expect me to stay in bed all day?

Gaius: That's exactly what you'll do. Now, lay down.

Merlin: But-

Gaius: Lay down.

Merlin: (recluntanly lays down) Can I read a book at least?

Gaius: I'll bring you some.

Time skip. Arthur with Kilgharrah.

Kilgharrah: I don't understand. Don't you want to start your reign, young Pendragon?

Arthur: Of course I do! But not at the cost of Merlin.

Kilgharrah: It's not just about saving him. It is Uther who persecutes Merlin and his kind. Even if Uther were to spare his life, which I doubt, your warlock won't be free until Uther dies.

Arthur: I know. But everything is getting out of my hands! I can't go back to my original plan and the back up plan is not an option now. (holds his head in desperation) How did everything turn out this bad? This never happened in my timeline!

Kilgharrah: Every change you've done, even if it was small, could lead to a complete different scenario. Being from the future won't prepare you for that.

Arthur: What do I do then? There's no pacific way to get out of this.

Kilgharrah: Maybe not pacific but, perhaps, a least violent one. Just enough to not worsen your warlock's state.

Arthur: Which is?

Kilgharrah: You needn't to involve others when the enemy is only one.

Arthur: ...

Kilgharrah: You already thought of it.

Arthur: (sighs) I did, I was just hoping you'll come up with something different.

Time skip. In Uther's chambers.

Gaius: (preparing another sedative)

Arthur: (enters) You don't have to do that anymore, Gaius.

Gaius: (turns to him, surprised) Sire!

Arthur: (smiles) Let him wake up. I want to speak with him alone.

Gaius: (nods in underdstanding) I'll prepare Merlin's things just in case.

Arthur: That won't be necessary, Gaius. Don't worry.

Gaius: ... Sire?

Arthur: (gives him a calm smile) You really don't have to worry, Gaius. I found I way to convince him. He won't be able to deny me this. You can go in peace.

Gaius: (unsure, but bows and leaves)

Arthur: (his smiles fades as soon as Gaius is gone, checks the doors are closed and then turns to Uther) This was not supposed to happen like this. (walks to the bed) I was going to give you an honorable dead, you were going to be remembered as a hero, even though you don't deserve it. You've hurt a lot of people, father. Murdered thousands of innocents in your grief... but aren't I about to do the same? Haven't I already done that to be where I stand? (pulls Uther's hair out of his face) It makes me wonder. Were you always a monster, father? Or you only turned this way when you lost my mother? You always insisted I marry for duty even though you married for love. Was it because you feared what I'll become if I were to fall in love like you? (lets a dry laugh) I guess what is inherited is not stolen. (grabs a pillow) There's a difference between me and you though. I'd never blame others for my own mistakes and I would never risk Merlin like you did with my mother. (holds the pillow close to Uther's face) I'm sorry.

Anhora: (appearing out of nowhere) Arthur Pendragon.

Arthur: (lets the pillow fall to the floor, almost jumping out of his skin, but quickly composes himself as he recgonises him) The keeper of the unicorns.

Anhora: Glad I don't have to introduce myself. I have come to deliver a message.

Arthur: (tired) Please don't tell me you'll curse Camelot. I don't have time for this. I let your unicorn go.

Anhora: For which I'm in debt with you. Whoever dares to slay a unicorn meets despair, but those who save one can be rewarded.

Arthur: Do you have an enchantment that can make my father forget all his absurd suspicions about Merlin? Because if you don't I don't know you how else you could help me.

Anhora: This is what I don't get. You spared the life of my unicorn, which is an act of a pure hearted person. Yet your heart is anything but pure. You are ready to enchant your father, to take his life just to fullfil your selfish desires.

Arthur: Is this my reward? A sermon?

Anhora: No. (gets a bracelet out of his pocket) this bracelet made of unicorn hair is a lucky charm. It could help turn chances at your favor, but it'll disappear as soon as you achieve your goal.

Arthur: You said could. You mean is not certain?

Anhora: You have to make your part and it'll only help you with one aim. The more short term and specific the better.

Arthur: That's a very useless lucky charm. 😒

Anhora: Useless or not it's yours. I beg you to use it wisely (extends the hand with the bracelet)

Arthur: (grabs it) Thank you.

Anhora: (about to leave, but turns) Prince of Camelot, if you keep down this pat you build and embrace the darkness in your heart to protect your love ones, that darkness will end up harming those you hold most dear.

Arthur: You think I don't know? You think I like doing what I'm doing? (laughs without humor) Is ironic. Where I come from you determined I was "pure of heart" for the same reason now you are determining I'm not. Because I wanted to save Merlin, to keep him safe. But even then I was willing to leave my kingdom without a heir just so he wouldn't die. My love was never pure.

Anhora: (with sadness) It was. It once was. One of the purest love I've ever seen. Or at least it could have been. Now it's corrupted.

Arthur: (surprised) You... you are-

Anhora: If something goes wrong this time, there will be no going back. And it will not be fate's fault. The blame will fall entirely on you, Arthur Pendragon. Are you prepared to assume the consequences of your actions?

Arthur: (serious) Yes.

Anhora: Then you are doomed (dissapears)

Arthur: (sighs and looks at the bracelet, thinking) This better work. (puts it on)

Uther: (wakes up) What…? Where am I?

Arthur: (takes a chair nearby and sits next to him) In your chambers, father. You had a seizure.

Uther: (still kind of groggy) Oh...

Arthur: Father, I know Merlin behaved very poorly and I take complete responsability for that. I've given him too many liberties since he is under my service. I failed to properly teach him how he should adress his superiors and for that I'm sorry. It won't happen again, but please, I beg you, spare his life.

Uther: (smiles softly) Alright, I'll spare him.

Arthur: (very surprised) Really? (thinking) This thing is more effective than I thought!

Uther: (smiles more brightly) Of course! Anything for my son.

Arthur: (thinking) ...okay, something's wrong. (says) Father, how many fingers do you see? (raises 3 fingers in front of his eyes)

Uther: Hmmm... Six!

Arthur: (lets out a sigh of exasperation, thinking) No! He's still drugged! It won't matter if he spares Merlin's life now, he'll take back his words as soon as he comes back to his senses...unless... (stands up and searches around the room quickly)

Uther: What are you doing son?

Arthur: (picks a parchment and a quill and sits back next to Uther) Can you show me how you sign your treates, father? I want to see if I'm doing it correctly.

Uther: My son, always looking for perfection. Alright. (signs)

Arthur: (thinking, looking at the parchment) The writing is stable enough. (says) Father, I just remember there are some urgent documents that need to be signed. I really don't want to bother you, you've just woken up, but you're the King. You're the only one the can do it.

Uther: I understand. You can bring them to me.

Arthur: I'll be right back. (stands up and goes to the door)

Uther: Arthur!

Arthur: (turns around)

Uther: I love you, son.

Arthur: (thinking, holding back the tears) Of course the only times you've told you loved me would be when you're drugged or in your deathbed. (says) I love you too, father. (leaves)

...

Anhora I hate you for stopping Arthur from killing Uther but I also love you cause now Arthur can go back to his original plan :D

How will Uther react when he comes back to his senses? Will Merlin really be safe? Find out in the next part of "Merlin: The Favourite of crocodile tears"

Also credits to my best friend Rosangela, who is practically beta and almost co-writer of this AU now.

Tagging @aceauthorcatqueen , @fallenxjas , @smileytrinity ,@lucifertookmyshoe , @an-entity-i-think , @thecornerofbelu , @griffonskies , @odinjm , @cinnabon-sweetroll-tiramisu , @thelady-mary , @bennedict , @nightninjaboy , @st8-of-grace , @star-rie , @error-username-not-available , @dogberryrowan , @jamieweasley13 , @tansyuduri , @tercais , @robynnemrys , @evadne01 , @serasvictoria02 , @hairdryerducks , @hopeaha , @curiously-lazy , @ harriettesthings , @andrealux16 , @wacko-weirdo , @greatdonutenemy , @yougottobekittenme , @anxiousosaurus , @kinkforwings , @someweirdassnamee , @impracticalantlers , @miyriu , @hobipabo , @whitemaskcd , @cute-girl-next-door , @bogslob , @tkmaras , @cunts-and-kermits

[anarchywoofwoof]

so today i learned that there’s a piece of graffiti written on the wall of a brothel in Pompeii that reads, “Weep, you girls. My penis has given you up. Now it penetrates men’s behinds. Goodbye, wondrous femininity!”

this lead me down a rabbit hole of Pompeii graffiti, in which i found the following:

From Herculaneum (a bar/inn joined to the maritime baths): "Two friends were here. While they were, they had bad service in every way from a guy named Epaphroditus. They threw him out and spent 105 and half sestertii most agreeably on whores."

From just outside the Vesuvius gate: "Defecator, may everything turn out okay so that you can leave this place."

From the peristyle of the Tavern of Verecundus: "Restitutus says: 'Restituta, take off your tunic, please, and show us your hairy privates.'"

From Herculaneum (a bar/inn joined to the maritime baths): "Apelles the chamberlain with Dexter, a slave of Caesar, ate here most agreeably and had a screw at the same time."

From the basilica: "O walls, you have held up so much tedious graffiti that I am amazed that you have not already collapsed in ruin."

that lead me down a rabbit hole of obscene ancient Roman graffiti such as the following:

Floronius, privileged soldier of the 7th legion, was here. The women did not know of his presence. Only six women came to know, too few for such a stallion.

Chie, I hope your hemorrhoids rub together so much that they hurt worse than when they ever have before!

Theophilus, don’t perform oral sex on girls against the city wall like a dog

Apollinaris, the doctor of the emperor Titus, defecated well here

Restituta, take off your tunic, please, and show us your hairy privates

I was fucking with the bartender

Secundus likes to screw boys

Phileros is a eunuch!

Cruel Lalagus, why do you not love me?

I made bread on April 19th

Gaius Sabinus says a fond hello to Statius. Traveler, you eat bread in Pompeii but you go to Nuceria to drink. At Nuceria, the drinking is better

Anyone who wants to defecate in this place is advised to move along. If you act contrary to this warning, you will have to pay a penalty. Children must pay [number missing] silver coins. Slaves will be beaten on their behinds.

Epaphra doesn’t play football well

You can ride your maid whenever you want. It’s your right

Pyrrhus to his colleague Chius: I grieve because I hear you have died; and so farewell

O walls, you have held up so much tedious graffiti that I am amazed that you have not already collapsed in ruin

My lusty son, with how many women have you had sexual relations?

If anyone sits here, let him read this first of all: if anyone wants a screw, he should look for Attice; she costs 4 sestertii.

Samius to Cornelius: go hang yourself!

If anyone does not believe in Venus, they should gaze at my girl friend

To the one defecating here. Beware of the curse. If you look down on this curse, may you have an angry Jupiter for an enemy

We have wet the bed, host. I confess we have done wrong. If you want to know why, there was no chamber pot

What a lot of tricks you use to deceive, innkeeper. You sell water but drink unmixed wine

The finance officer of the emperor Nero says the food here is poison

Gaius was here – the oldest graffiti, dated 78 BCE; found in Pompeii.

Vote for Isidorus for aedile, he licks cunts the best

i fucking love human beings.

[justaz]

this got longer than i meant it to so im putting it under the cut

merlin and morgana watching arthur and gwen be The Couple in camelot. they are heartbroken, jealous, and tired- no, exhausted. they've arthur and gwen for years and fell madly and hopelessly in love with them (respectively). however, they care for the both of them and if they’re happy together then merlin and morgana will simply bite their tongue. besides, its not like their feelings are reciprocated so there’s no use in stirring up trouble.

but the pain eats away at them until they are shadows of their previous selves. merlin is quiet and demure while morgana’s lighthearted snark is growing harsher and harsher. it comes to a head when morgana makes a scathing remark to merlin about his feelings. before, her comments had been directed at others, arthur more often than not, but never toward merlin. they were in the same boat so why would morgana target him?

but she did and things get a little tense. then merlin finds a spell and shows morgana and the two of them, utterly exhausted and desperate for an end to their agony, agree to take part in the spell together. merlin concocts the potion and they both down it. the next day, merlin and morgana are as happy as can be. it was a startling 180° from the morose and downtrodden duo they had been not even twelve hours before to the happy, on cloud nine, nothing is wrong with the world people that hummed as they danced around the castle

merlin and morgana exclaim to one another how freeing it is to not feel such a heavy burden of unrequited love. they mention how easy it is to breath. how they haven’t been this happy and carefree in years. of course, like everything else, there comes a price

to be rid of feelings like love, the opposite feeling would take it’s place. a lot of people believe the opposite of love to be hate, but it is in fact indifference. it starts off slow where gwen makes inside jokes that morgana cant remember. then it moves to them having trouble remembering arthur and gwen’s names. then their memories begin to rewrite themselves to remove arthur and gwen from their minds. eventually, they roam the halls, arm in arm, without even a glance at either arthur or gwen bc they cant find it in themselves to care about these two random strangers. who would?

arthur and gwen go to gaius who has already noted their odd behaviors and has been looking into it. the rest of the knights join them in gaius’s chambers bc they had also noticed how weird they were acting. lancelot is quiet and brooding until arthur pushes him to confess what he knows.

lancelot tells them how he fell for gwen the first time he had come to camelot. she flushes and arthur seems upset but lancelot continues. he tells them all how despite, or maybe because of, his love for gwen, he let her go to be with arthur bc she was happy with him. he hesitates and gwen encourages him. lancelot mentally apologizes to his two magical friends and spills the beans. he explains how morgana has loved gwen for years and how merlin has loved arthur for years. the three of them had bonded after arthur and gwen were engaged about how much it hurt watching the person you love be happy with someone else.

slowly, he pulls out a vial filled with glittering, dark red liquid - dark like blood. he hands it to gaius and explains how they had come to him a few days ago with that and said how it would cure his pain. it would wash away his love for gwen so he wasn’t crushed under the weight of it. he says he never took it bc he didn’t think it was right but merlin and morgana had already taken it. he wasn’t sure what the side effects were going to be until he saw them that afternoon.

gaius finds what the potion is and explains how it did in fact wash away their feelings of love for arthur and gwen and with the absence of love, indifference took hold. he wasn’t sure if their missing memories could be attributed to the indifference or if the spell took to wiping the memories to prevent the love from regrowing.

arthur and gwen are quiet, guilty and upset that their closest friends were going thru such turmoil and they weren’t aware at all. leon clears his throat and asks how to cure them. gaius grimaces and read the book a bit more before responding that a counter potion would do the trick, it would neutralize the previous potion by bringing back their memories and feelings. arthur is quick to agree but gaius interrupts that once the counter potion has been administered, everything will come back at once. everything.

they question him and he explains that every memory, every word spoken, every touch, and every feeling from the past 7+ years will run through them at the same time. considering they’ve been dealing with unreciprocated love and watching the one they love be with someone else for the past couple of years, it wouldn’t be that farfetched to assume that they would look and sound like dying animals. suffice to say, it wouldn’t be pretty.

in spite of the guilt and fear in arthur, he insists that they have to bring merlin and morgana back. he doesn’t want to put them in pain but he cant just let them wipe themselves away and continue on with his life as if he didn’t just lose his best friend and sister. they spike merlin and morgana’s wine with the potion and, as gaius predicted, merlin and morgana both drop to the floor, screaming and crying in pain, pleading with anyone to make it stop and take the pain away.

gwen hides her tears in elyan’s shoulder, arthur uses his long taught skill of being an Emotionless Prick of a Prince his father taught him to not cry. the tears stay in his eyes and do not fall. a few minutes later, merlin and morgana are both catatonic on the ground, limp and staring at nothing. their breathing is slow, so slow they almost appeared dead.

lancelot and gwaine help merlin up and take him to his chambers while leon and percival do the same for morgana. no one mentions what happened and merlin and morgana stay locked in their rooms for two days before being able to get up out of bed. they aren’t back to their shadow selves from two weeks prior, nor are they the happy go lucky duo from the past few days. instead, they are slow and quiet and barely even there. they’re barely even people anymore. simply going through the motions.

[archiveofcamelot]

someone finds out merlin has magic and tells arthur directly about it

originally wrote this about an oc, but it fits merlin just as much!

(⁠*⁠˘⁠︶⁠˘⁠*⁠)⁠.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡

It was a random servant in the castle. Someone walked past Gaius’ chambers and saw that Merlin was healing somebody. . . while his eyes glowed. Shame on Merlin for not closing the door, but how could you blame him when he had to rush in to help a person in need?

The servant ran off to Arthur’s meeting room and told him what she saw.

Arthur’s reaction wasn’t very. . . positive, because, well, he was in the middle of a meeting. Apparently the servant urged the guards to let her in to warn Arthur about magic within castle walls. She told him that she saw Merlin was using magic to heal someone and that his eyes were glowing.

Do you know what Arthur’s response was?

“While I’m not happy that you’ve disrupted my meeting, I’ll entertain your story. It’s easy to debunk, really. Merlin is a physician and has been training under Gaius for a while now. I understand that a physician’s work is hard to understand for people like you and me, who don’t know much about that sort of thing, but to say it’s magic goes a little bit too far. And his eyes, glowing? Well, I find his eyes quite beautiful, too. Now, please leave us, and don’t spread such nonsense anymore.”

He gestured for her to leave, so the guards escorted her away. Under his breath, he muttered something along the lines of, “Merlin, a sorcerer? That’s just not possible. It’s Merlin. Stupid, airheaded, but kind and loving Merlin.”

[dryadalisliv]

Merthur ao3 recs

The trouble with Daisies 23.4k words

Merlin is just settling into his new role as Court Sorcerer and trying to figure out where he's exactly standing with Arthur when he finds himself adopting a dog completely by accident.

A dog who seems to hate the king with a burning passion.

Arthur is far from amused.

---

The moon stays warped in silence 12.6k words

"What is wrong with me Ma?" asks little Merlin his mother. "What is wrong with me?" asks Arthur Pendragon to the moon. About monsters and their hearts and how they love life so much that it hurts.

---

Little ones 14.5k words

“Did you just say you found two children in Arthur’s bed, Merlin?” Gaius gave him The eyebrow. Or, when two children who look weirdly similar to Merlin and Arthur appear in the prince's chambers, they have to find out where they came from. In which secrets get revealed, families founded and chaos ensues!

---

Sunny in Camelot 14.6k words

"Merlin," Uther says, "For your alleged crimes, I would normally sentence you to death by fire. But, because my son has requested it… I have granted you a fair trial. All witnesses and involved parties shall state their cases, and then a verdict will be reached. Is this understood?"

"Yes sire."

"Now you will each tell me, in your own account, what on earth happened this week."

"Your majesty, it all began Tuesday…"

---

The Hunt for Red Emrys 27.9k words

King Arthur sets out to keep his promise to the spirit of the Druid boy by repealing his father's ban on magic. Unfortunately, this is easier said than done, for reasons including but not limited to the following:

(1) He can't change the law until he understands magic better, but no sorcerer is willing to explain magic to him until he changes the law;

(2) The sorcerers all have some strange obsession with Merlin, which is awakening all sorts of feelings in Arthur that he really doesn't fancy examining too closely;

(3) He is starting to feel like the butt of some Druid-population-wide inside joke involving the mysterious phenomenon called Emrys; and

(4) Oh yeah, Morgana is still trying to kill him.

Thus he embarks on a journey of discovery, diplomacy, accountability, and self-improvement, and maybe even falls in love along the way.

---

Forgotten Memories 8k words

Relying on pure luck and Merlin’s inexistent ability to keep a secret was not working any longer. So, Merlin figured better to be prepared and memorized a spell that could erase short-term memories. Honestly, he’d meant it as an emergency protocol, he had no idea how he’d become so careless that he needed it so often. It wasn’t his fault Arthur seemed to be paying way too much attention to him lately. Look, Merlin was just trying to survive while protecting his prince, he hadn’t done anything to deserve all this stress!

Or the 5 times Merlin erased Arthur’s memory of his magic and the 1 time he let him remember.

---

The Laughter From the Next Room 24.5k words

A small ball hovered in her hand, shining with a silver-blue light. It floated there, getting brighter and brighter before dimming again. Wisps of cloud swirled at its center. It was pure magic. And the breath was stolen from Arthur’s lungs. “I thought you’d recognize it. He said it was warm. He said it reminded him of home.”

It has been one year since Merlin's death when Arthur meets Morgana on the battlefield. Somehow, between all the guilt and shame, he discovers that his sister knew Merlin better than he ever did - and ever would.

^^

( actually one of the best fics i have ever read, and it made me sob and ugly cry, my god!)

[skythighs]

Goddess of Caladan: Home

Has anyone else been craving an unhinged codependent relationship? No? Just me, got it. Be prepared for Paul to slowly descend into madness all while his twin enables his behavior like there's no tomorrow. I'll be linking all pictures on my masterlist.

Warnings: CW Inc*st, sexual content 18+ please.

Word count: 3.3k

Part 1

My earliest memories are of my brother. I'll never forget the sound of his pitter patter feet running across the solid stone floors of our shared chambers. After our nanny thought we were asleep and tucked in for the night she would leave us for her own bed. Within seconds of the solid door latching closed he would make his way to me. We would lie chest to chest, nose to nose breathing each other's air until we fell asleep. For years when we were discovered in a tangle of limbs in the morning it was harmless and sweet. It was ‘just what twins do’. 

There was no harm in it, until there was. By age ten our mother Lady Jessica calmly spoke to us of the closeness between us. She was understanding of the bond we share but now we must separate for propriety's sake. It was not proper for us to share a bed anymore. We had already been put in separate chambers by now. Paul was male, and I was female. He could no longer cuddle with me, his sister throughout the night without certain whispers being spread by servants. 

We were ten when we agreed to never be caught in each other's bed again. Paul trained himself to rise before the sun, before the servants started their day, before they could spy on us and gossip. Or worse, report back to mother. As long as we weren't seen in each other's bed it meant we were no longer sharing a bed at all. It meant we were no longer ‘too close’.

In all actuality we were too close. Paul's heart beat to the same rhythm as my own. My very thoughts would pass his lips the instant it crossed my mind, despite our best efforts we were one. In our childhood our feelings were as innocent as we were. Pure of heart and intentions. However as our bodies changed so did our interactions. There was an odd tension between us by age fourteen. I experienced the first bitter taste of womanhood and Paul grew two feet overnight. 

He was the one that shook me awake informing me of the bloodied sheets beneath us. He didn't know where I was bleeding from just that I was and it frightened him. I reassured him it was normal, it meant that I was no longer a child. Somehow the odd feelings between us grew after that day and I felt the rhythm in his chest speed up whenever he stared at me for too long. 

“Claudia, you are blossoming beautifully into your features. Gone is the awkward little girl, all elbows and knees. In her place stands a young lady with a lovely figure and a lovelier face.” 

My mother praised me for my transformation while Paul became distant. He himself was no longer a lanky boy, he filled out with a bit of muscle from all the training over the years. Whenever I could spare the time I would watch him spar with Duncan, or Gurney. My mother trained me in the ways of the Bene Gesserit sisterhood extensively. Paul was also being instructed by her but being born male put him at a disadvantage. I tried helping him correct his pitch when he tried to use the voice but nothing I could do ever helped.  

No matter how distant he was during the daylight hours he still slept beside me at night. We were still a tangle of limbs chest to chest, nose to nose. His dreams were my dreams and I saw the girl on the desert planet as clear as he did. Her blue eyes were altered by the spice of Arrakis making her honey brown skin all the more beautiful. 

The news of the Emperor bestowing Arrakis to House Atreides was no shock to Paul or me. The Reverend mother Gaius Helen Mohiam arrived after that. She tested us separately and was pleased to know we weren't animals as she feared. Paul was the Atreides heir after all and him being an animal simply wouldn't do. He was also his mothers son, too much power was within him. Male children didn’t usually get trained in The Way. Me however I had no real role besides being married off to some other great house when the time came. At sixteen some thought I was old enough to be wed but not my father. 

Duke Leto refused to make me a child bride no matter how much the Imperium pushed for it. He defied the order that came to promise me to House Harkonnen. In fact he never spoke of it with anyone, but me. He promised he would never let them have me. His argument for my mother was about my age. He couldn’t tell her to her face that he would not help fulfill the Bene Gesserit order.

“Claudia is only sixteen years old. I will not force her into a marriage so young Jessica, you cannot change my mind.” 

Jessica knew when she had been bested and she knew better than to push him on this. She also knew when she was being deceived. Claudia was his angel for whom he would carve out a piece of the very sky if she asked it of him. He had no intention of marrying her off now or ever. 

It was a bit humid due to the rain, making sleep difficult to come by tonight. Paul was facing away from me shirtless and I found myself stroking his hair absentmindedly, occasionally dipping down his spine languidly. 

“I told Duncan about my dream. About seeing his death on Arrakis. He didn’t take me seriously.”

Hmm, I hum in response. I saw the dream with my own eyes. I felt his want, his guttural need to save Duncan. I felt it so strongly I wept in the morning. I continue stroking him as he turns to face me. He looks down at my cream colored nightgown which was left unbuttoned at the top. I knew what he was going to do before he acted upon it. His soft lips brushed against mine gently. He was waiting to see my reaction. Would I push him away? He couldn’t handle another rejection today after his talk with father about joining Duncan on Arrakis. 

I kiss him back slowly, the way he needs me to. I feel his warm tongue run against my lips hesitantly as I open for him. He deepens the kiss sinking down on top of me. He fit so perfectly against me. We were molded in each other's image afterall. The familiar quick rhythm returned to his chest, but this time my own heart matched its pace. Words weren’t needed between us. They haven’t been for a long time, we understood each other better than anyone else. 

The tension that had been brewing between us had finally reached its peak. We were experiencing a metamorphosis here and now on a dark rainy night. One of the last nights on our home planet before we moved across the galaxy to make Arrakis our new residence. 

“I need you Claud, let me have you. Please let me have you. Always.”

Brown eyes meet green, brown like the supple fertile soil that sustains the living trees that flourish on Caladan’s surface. Brown in a much different way than the rolling dunes of Arrakis. Where Arrakis was barren and life was a struggle. Her brown was a brown entirely familiar to him. Her amber eyes had been his constant companion since life sparked in the womb. They were brown even then in his consciousness; she was meant for him even then. 

‘I’ve always been yours’

I don’t speak it, because I don’t have to. He knows my answer, he’s always known. I spread my legs for him, welcoming him home for the first time, but not the last. He lifts my gown over my head tossing it aside. My chest is on the small side but he doesn’t care. He worships my breasts slowly, not missing an inch of skin. His tongue is slow and exploratory before his teeth become demanding. Nips and bites make me cry out softly unable to swallow them all down. He moves down to the apex between my thighs. 

He sucks me urgently, familiarizing himself with the blooming petals. He finds my slit wet and wanting. I can’t tell where his mouth ends and my body begins as he delves inside. His fingers are involved and I know they are working equally as hard as his mouth. I couldn’t decipher anything past the absolute pleasure and joy bursting within me. A pleasure that was quickly spilling over like sticky wine in a fine goblet. A sweetness that nearly soured on the tongue, an acquired taste that only he would ever enjoy.

 My core snaps harshly, something that had never been, now was. My eyes roll to the back of my head and a limpness passes over me. He laps up my nectar slowly savoring this moment. The first of many moments such as this. I feel Paul watching me as he settles his hips against me again. 

“Claud, are you with me?” He calls so softly, almost as if he’s afraid of waking me.

My eyes snap open and I feel my limp limbs gain strength again.

“I’m here, I’m with you.” I nod looking at him. I pull his forehead to mine and wrap my thighs around him snugly. His bare chest is pressed against mine and I help him push his slacks down. Hands fumbling together, shaking with anticipation as the last barrier between us is gone. 

‘Your home, with me. No matter where life takes us. This is where you belong.’

He enters me slowly, his forehead is still resting against mine. As I exhale he's breathing me in until his lungs burn. I look into his eyes and I see his pupils blown wide, his body responding to mine like a drug. When he bottoms out he drops his head to my neck, pecking at me trying to calm his hummingbird heartbeat before he goes further. My insides are so slick all I felt was a mild discomfort as he broke through my barrier. His breath quivers and I feel his tears run down my neck collecting in the dip of my clavicle. 

“Shh, my love don't weep.” I stroke his hair slowly to soothe away his tears.

I circle my hips from below him, testing the foreign feeling within me. Pleasure blooms between us and he begins thrusting slowly into me. Savoring this new level of intimacy between us he takes his time. Our lips lock in an unbreakable kiss. Inhale. Exhale. We breathe each other in, with each stroke the cup overflows. Our sounds of pleasure are swallowed into the kiss. Only soft whimpers and sighs could be heard between us. His thrusts increase and we finally pull apart. My head is thrown back in ecstasy as he licks up the puddle of tears he left behind. 

Skin slapping skin is such an odd sound. A very distinct sound that couldn’t be replicated easily, but we are too far gone to care. His movements grow sloppy as I meet him thrust for thrust, always pulling him closer as he pulls away. His peak was nearing now I could feel the ripples under the surface of his skin. I could feel the odd tingling down below. The tightening of his sack. I felt his ecstasy as well as my own. It was a feeling that could easily overwhelm, but we shared it equally.

“I’m going to cum Claud. Tell me where.” His breathless voice rings out in the darkness. 

“Inside Paul, always inside.”

My words push him over the edge of a cliff and where he goes I follow. We tumble one after the other off the highest peak on Caladan. We could be falling to our deaths, or the pits of hell, but we do it together. Always together. Always as one single entity. One single life split in two.

We said goodbye to Caladan by enjoying the beaches closest to the castle for the last time. Paul was in a melancholic mood, matching his black coat and travel garb. The ship had been raised from the sea and everything we owned was boxed in preparation for the journey. The Atreides castle was now bleak and eerily silent. I left Paul to himself while I explored our empty home. The corridors seemed ominous now, so dark and dank and lonely. Arrakis could be a welcomed change. It was always sunny and bright, it never rained there. Rain for weeks on end always dampened my mood, no pun intended. 

Deep down my brother was looking forward to seeing Arrakis. It meant he was one step closer to facing the girl from his dreams. He tried to hide that feeling away, but he couldn’t keep things from me. No matter how hard he tried, I already knew. I appreciated him trying to spare me the pain, but what we shared was beyond petty feelings of jealousy. At least that was true for me. Men were different. 

I was looking forward to meeting her in the flesh whenever that may be. I would accept her if he chooses her, but would she accept me? Would she understand that Paul and I would always be together no matter who else entered our lives? I would always be his Caladan.

“When did you sneak off?”

Paul's voice startles me out of my thoughts. He wraps his arm around my shoulder pulling me into his side.

“You seemed preoccupied. I didn’t want to bother you.” I look up at him as I speak tucked beneath his shoulder.

“You could never be a bother to me, Claudia.” 

He leans down and captures my lips in a sweet kiss. His kiss was the one bit of brightness in the dark damp hallway. We hadn’t been together in an intimate way since that night we shared together. Even still things were different. His eyes called out to me from across any room. His lips beckoned me forward across the dinner table as we dined with our parents. He looked at me with such love and devotion it was impossible to miss.

A stranger would think of me, his great love. They would never take me for his sister, but we had always been close. It could be overlooked for now but eventually mother and father would realize, this was no longer the bond of twins. The echo of footsteps reaches us so we break the kiss but he keeps me tucked into his side as our mother rounds the corner.

“There you two are. We’re ready to board.”

She smiles at us briefly before her smile falls quickly. She looks us over slowly, taking stock, attempting to find what it is that’s different.

“Shall we go mother?” Asks Paul. He feels the probing eyes the same as me. 

She nods her head and turns away from us, leading the way for the last time in the halls we chased each other in as children. The halls we took our first steps in. This was the castle where we shared our first kiss. Our first everything, happened here. The castle where we were born together. Where our childhood was laid to rest a week ago in the night, in each other's arms.

We had been traveling for two weeks already on the guild heighliner with two more weeks left ahead of us. On the up side there was plenty of time for rest and relaxation. Being cooped in my designated room for the duration of travel was not fun so I ventured out often. I chatted with servants and soldiers alike, making the time pass as best I could. Paul and I spent uninterrupted hours together. As close as we were before, it grew tenfold. He spent hours inside of me in these weeks. Hours beneath me, on top of me, beside me.

 I was currently stretched out across his bed. His quarters were larger than mine which allowed for a bigger bed. I certainly took advantage of it. He was sitting at a small table reading about Arrakis no doubt and I was in my nightgown braiding my hair away from my face. My thick dark hair piled into a thick rope of a braid with only a few stray pieces around my face caught his attention. 

He abandons his book on the table and makes his way towards the bed slowly. He strokes my braid gently, wrapping it around his hand. A quick rap on the door breaks the spell. 

“Yes?” Says Paul, annoyed at the interruption. 

“Have you seen Claudia? She's not in her room.”

She was using that tone mothers used when they already knew the answer to the question. Paul removes his hand from my hair reluctantly.

“I'm here.” I replied to her. Paul rolls his eyes at me not liking that I gave away my position. 

She cracks the door open slowly, timidly even. As if she's afraid of what she might see from the threshold. 

“It's late, Claud. You should be in your own bed.”

Ah, there it is. The thing that had been brewing for a fortnight now. Her suspicion had taken root now. She could feel that something was strange between us, she was our mother after all.

“Paul doesn't mind my company mother. He's been reading-”

“Claudia, it's late. If you want to escape travel fatigue you should be in bed by now.” She blatantly cuts me off. She was dismissing me from his room. There was little room for argument. 

I stand up and grab my robe, securing it. I see Paul shaking his head at her frustration clear on his face but I don't comment on it. I bid them goodnight and walked past her in the doorway. The walk to my room is short. Once I arrive I discard my robe on a chair and climb into bed. I fall asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow. 

The opening of my door barely registers past the thick cloud of sleep. It's his lips that get my attention. He kisses my shoulder lightly as he climbs in behind me. Sleep claims me again now that he was here with me. Our bodies fall into the perfect rhythm that only happens when we're together. Inhale. Exhale. If I'm the sky he's what clouds are made of. 

In the last weeks of our journey my mother's probing eyes followed me closely. Just me. For she always struggles to find fault in Paul; her loves heir was perfect in her eyes. He was the boy our father asked for. He was Lady Jessica's success story. I was just a daughter. Any daughter would do but Paul was special to her, we all knew it. 

My father compensated for her love of Paul by adoring me twice as much. He was the balancing force at the center of our family. He was seated across from me, a chess board between us as he contemplated his next move. 

“I'm afraid you've finally surpassed me Claud. There's nothing I can do to stop you from winning.”

I look closer at the board. I hadn't even noticed.

“Ah, there. You're right this match goes to me.”

“Shall we play another round?” Asks my father cheerfully.

The door to the office opens and Paul walks in, eyes locking on mine. I had been avoiding him during the day afraid of the ever present mother hen.

“Perhaps Paul should take my place, I'll go have a nap.” 

I stand and kiss my father's cheek. Avoiding Paul's eyes as I leave without another word. When I step over the threshold I hear father ask if we've been arguing. 

“We never fight.” Paul replies easily. 

[thedeadestartist]

To Kill Magic Itself

Fic inspired by prompt by @obsessionrepression

"Kind of want a fic of Arthur being sent on a quest to kill Magic itself, the god of magic, the most powerful sorcerer to walk the Earth, Emrys, and Merlin is just standing in the background sweating Ok, so maybe Uther hears from some captive druids about Emrys and how he’s magic itself, god of magic, so on so forth. So obviously, to get rid of magic in the world, this Emrys guy has to be killed! So Uther sends Arthur on a quest to get rid of magic once and for all, and of course, Merlin is along for the ride. This could be a pretty cool concept and magic reveal I think. I’m no good at writing though so please someone write this"

5.5k words

You can also read it on ao3 if you prefer, here.

“Please, I don’t have much time before the guards return,” Merlin pleaded.

Yet still, the young man did not move an inch. From behind the iron bars, Merlin could see the boy he firmly grasped to his body. 

Uther must have threatened to kill the druid’s son.

“You’re right,” squeaked a small muffled voice.

“Hush now, Arawn,” the father spoke quickly. And then he shifted slightly, turning his hooded face further away from Merlin.  “After what I have done, I cannot dare to look upon you, Emrys.”

“Then I won’t ask you to look at me, but please, I need to know.”

“I did what I had to do and-

“And I forgive you! Now, come on, I am begging you. Tell me what it is that Uther knows!”

The man in the cell clasped the boy in his arms ever tighter. Merlin steeled his heart.

“You, Emrys. He knows how to find you. He thinks you are the source of all magic. He thinks that if he kills you, he kills it all.”

“But how will he know how to find me?”

“I gave him an ancient device - the Argannwyf. It traces the strongest magic. I’m sorry, Emrys,” the man started to sob. “He promised to leave me and my family in peace.”

Merlin felt a scream burning in his throat but, instead, bit his tongue. All of this time, despite every close call, he had managed to hide his greatest secret from Arthur. But now, because of someone else…

“It’s okay,” he said in a hushed tone. “I forgive you, so please- when you escape from here, never come back. Live safe and free.”

The druid finally looked up at him, his eyes wet.

“Thank you, Emrys. You are the very best of us all.”

A distant shuffle prompted Merlin to quickly scramble to his feet and hastily turn back to his quarters. As he left, he turned back one last time and saw the druid’s son staring after him. The young child was too far away to hear, but Merlin could tell it was surely some words  of desperate gratitude. And pity.

…..

In the Physician’s chambers, Gaius listened to the young warlock's account of the druid’s statement in patient silence. When the young man had finished, he stared solemnly at the boy he had come to love as a son. Then he started,

“Merlin, you have to listen to me very carefully. If what the druid has said is true, you are in the most danger you have ever been in. What he has offered to Uther is incredibly powerful, and will expose you instantly, to Arthur, to everyone.”

The young man’s breath caught in his throat. He was no stranger to the threat of being revealed, but it sent a shock down his spine every time. To lose Arthur, his home with Gauis, the friends he had across Camelot…

He would argue it was a fate worse than death.

“So what do I do then?” he said quickly. “There must be a way out of this, surely, Gaius?”

Gaius’ brows furrowed as he rapidly attempted to recall the vast years of knowledge he had accumulated. There must have been something in all those books he had committed to memory before he was forced to burn them. Some way out of this trap that had been set before them.

“I don’t know,” he said finally. “At least not right now. I’m sure I will think of something by the setting of the sun but until I do… Merlin, prepare yourself for a worst case scenario.”

And once those chilling words, a heavy knock resounded from their door. There was a pause and then a servant boy entered.

“Court Physician, sir? And Merlin too? The King has summoned you both for an important announcement. He demands your presence.”

Gaius nodded quickly, “Thank you, boy. Run along, we’ll be right after you to the Council Chamber.”

The boy nodded and vanished as quickly as he appeared.

Merlin trembled slightly, and asked hurriedly, “Gaius, they haven’t used it already! Surely?!”

“I really doubt that, Merlin,” Gaius answered. “The Argannwyf and other magic tracing devices must be charged by magic first. The druid probably promised to do so upon the day of his release, to ensure Uther keeps his word. Well, at least, we must hope so. Let’s go find out.”

…..

Uther was filled with complete and utter glee. Everyone in the Council Chamber, from anxious Merlin to the servants pouring the wine could taste it in the air. If the situation weren’t so dire for Merlin, perhaps he would feel just as at ease as the rest of the council members. But instead, he felt as if he was being marched towards his death. 

The only one, it seemed, who dared to sour the mood, was the beloved prince of camelot.

“My dear council!” Uther exclaimed, a little tipsy from the numerous chalices of wine he had downed. “Our fight will finally have been won!”

Arthur turned sharply at the King’s words and exclaimed, “But, father, are you sure we can even trust them!” 

Uther solemnly clasped his hands together before he answered. The question had already circled around his head many times since the druid had spoken. But this opportunity was too good to pass up; a way to rid his kingdom of magic, once and for all? They had to at least try.

“My boy, it would serve you well to remember what our greatest enemy is - what it always has been. We must cleanse our kingdom of magic, no matter the cost. Besides, even if the druid has lied to us and magic in its entirety does not die with that sorcerer, there is one less sorcerer to bring downfall upon Camelot. The most powerful sorcerer on this Earth! That’s worth the quest to kill him, is it not?”

The Prince grimaced and asked another question, “What if it’s a trap? To tempt me away from the castle and launch an attack with some other druids hiding in the shadows!”

Uther laughed heartily.

“Then, Prince Arthur, I would defend my kingdom as I have successfully done for the past 50 years as its King.”

Then he motioned to Gaius, standing beside him.

“And even then, Gaius has assured me that if indeed the druid and his Emrys-seeking device are nothing but a desperate man’s attempt to save himself and his family from the pyre, then he would die according to the rules of his own magic.”

“Unlike other sorcerers, the ways of the Old Magic are absolute,” Gaius ad libbed. “When a druid takes an oath, it must be honoured - or death dealt. There is no trickery when it comes to the oaths of the Old Magic.”

When Uther had revealed that the druid had ‘sworn’ the device would work upon being granted freedom, Gaius had quickly spun a lie that a druid’s word was absolute. For now, it was important that the druid’s sacrifice would not have been one made in vain.

“Well, there you have it, my son. Prepare to ride with your knights in two days time. If the druid is still alive, then he must be telling the truth. And we will never have to live in fear again, once you’ve disposed of this… Emrys. You are dismissed.”

Arthur gritted his teeth and turned on his heel.

“Merlin, escort me to my chambers,” he ordered as he exited the doors of the Council Chamber.

And just before the heavy doors swung closed, Merlin slipped through behind him.

“Are you okay, Arthur?” Merlin asked cautiously, though he couldn’t help but find it incredibly ironic that he was having to ask such a question when he himself was trembling in fear.

Arthur did not answer and continued stomping his way to his personal chambers, throwing open the doors.

“Arthur?” Merlin prodded.

As the door shut itself behind him, Arthur turned to look at his servant.

“Merlin, what I am about to tell you must not leave this room. Do you understand?”

The young man nodded quickly.

His prince sighed.

“Merlin, do you think what my father said is true? That if we kill this one sorcerer, all the magic in the kingdom will be gone also?” He asked earnestly.

“I–”

“And be honest, Merlin. Don't treat this question as if I am a prince. Pretend we're both peasants or something.”

“I don't think you'd be a great peasant Arthur if I'm hone–”

“Merlin! Just answer the question. Please.”

“I don't know, sire.”

“Yeah, I don't either.”

Arthur collapsed into his chair, his hands over his face.

The two men sat in silence for a few moments.

“All my life, my father has sent me on these countless conquests to vanquish magic. Yet magic persists.”

The Prince sat up, folding his arms upon his desk and laying his head upon them. Even though Merlin couldn't see it, he could perfectly picture the tired expression on Arthur's face. Uther was growing old, and Arthur was growing tired of his father refusing to acknowledge so. All of the quests he was sent on, felt like just another excuse to postpone allowing Arthur to ascend to the throne. And it wasn't as if he was desperate for it. He just knew that his father needed to rest and that he, himself, had to learn how to lead and rule.

“Besides, is it really right to go hunting for someone who has not attacked us first?” Arthur pondered aloud. “What if this guy, the most powerful magic sorcerer in the world, has been choosing to be peaceful? What if our attack unleashes a greater threat to Camelot? What then?”

Merlin stood perfectly still. The Prince’s thoughts were words he so desperately craved. If Arthur were in power, would he be a better King than Uther? Surely he would, he did not have Uther's hardened heart. And with the words he spoke just now, there was opportunity for peace with all users of magic. Peace for Merlin. It sounded almost too good to be true.

“Arthur, I–”

But Merlin's words were interrupted by a soft knock at the door.

“Sire, may I request Merlin's presence?” Gaius’ voice spoke through the wood.

Arthur dismissed Merlin with a wave, without even raising his head from the desk.

“Merlin, don't forget we're leaving in two days,” he mumbled as his servant walked away. “Make sure to have everything we need packed by then.”

“Yes, my lord,” Merlin spoke as he softly closed the door behind him.

…..

Back in the Physician’s quarters, Merlin drew in a long deep breath. He had been pacing around the room since Gaius had explained the plan.

“And you’re sure it’ll work?” he repeated for the seventh time. “My life is on the line here, Gaius.”

“I can’t be completely sure until you’ve done the spell and Uther activates the device, but it’s your best chance,” his mentor answered.

“Then what are we waiting for?” Merlin spoke. “Let’s do it, right now.”

“But, Merlin. Be aware that this type of magic is very risky. It is not to be taken lightly,” Gaius warned.

The young man stopped pacing and looked at the old man.

“I know. But like you said, this is my best chance.”

“Then I'll gather the ingredients and prepare the potion, while you check the incantation and process in the book,” Gaius nodded.

In theory, the plan was simple enough. The book provided a guide to a spell on how to split one’s magic. If Merlin could split his magic and the stronger part were placed elsewhere, it would lead them away from the castle. Somewhere far enough for Merlin to either have the device ‘accidentally’ break or find some other way to convince Arthur that killing the strongest sorcerer would not bring down all magic. Either way, he needed to buy enough time for the druid and his son to get out of Camelot.

In reality, both Merlin and Gaius knew it was not so easy. There was no guarantee that it would work at all. And if it did, there were other complications. Magic outside the body must be bound to a complete physical object or it would naturally return to its sorcerer. How would he get the separated part of his magic far enough in time, before they had to leave? What if someone else found the object and took it, or broke it? What if without his full force of magic, Merlin was unable to protect Arthur during a surprise attack on the expedition?

“Merlin,” Gaius spoke softly, shaking the man from his thoughts. “The potion is ready.”

“Let's do this then,” Merlin smiled nervously.

The Physician pulled a locket from his pocket and placed it on the table before the most powerful sorcerer to have ever lived.

“This is a locket that my mother passed on to me before she died. She always said it brought her luck, and I think you need that more than me,” Gaius spoke. “You can bind your magic to this, and bury it as far from as you can before you leave.”

Merlin picked it up and felt the coolness of the metal through his fingertips.

“Thank you, Gaius,” he said.

With a nod, Gaius handed the potion to Merlin, who downed the liquid in one swig. Once the contents had reached his stomach, the sorcerer spoke the incantation and the locket glowed a fiery red. It burned so hot that both men could feel the heat on their faces. It glowed brighter and brighter, blue and then white, and then– 

It was over. The locket looked just as it had before. But when Merlin took it in his hands, this time he could feel the fast pulse of magic.

“I think it worked,” he said cautiously.

“Then you must go now. Bury it and be back before you're due to leave, quickly,” Gaius urged.

“Thank you, Gaius,” Merlin said, “Not just for this, but for all you've done for me.”

“You are very welcome, my boy,” Gaius smiled, pushing a bag of food into Merlin's hands and ushering him through the door. “Now go, and be safe.”

…..

“Where is Merlin!” Arthur demanded. “We’re supposed to leave in an hour and he's nowhere to be seen!”

“Maybe he ran off, your majesty,” Gwaine grinned. “We're trying to kill the most powerful sorcerer. He probably just didn't want to run to his death.”

“We're not going to die,” Arthur muttered. “I've fought many sorcerers before and I'm still alive.”

“Yeah, but none of them were the most powerful, were they?”

“Sir Gwaine?”

“Yes, my lord?”

“Shut up.”

“Yes, my lord.”

At the close of that exchange, the door to the Knight’s quarters flung open. And Merlin appeared, doubled over out of breath.

“There you are, Merlin, you useless servant,” Arthur said, anger flooding his voice and drowning the hint of relief in his tone. “Where have you been these past few days! I couldn't find you anywhere!”

“Oh, you can't have been looking for me that hard if you couldn't find me anywhere,” Merlin grinned mischievously, ducking away just in time to avoid a swipe from Arthur. “Besides, I was doing what you told me. Everything's packed, the horses are all ready, we can leave at your word.”

“Oh,” Arthur frowned. “But it surely can't have taken you that long, why weren't you there when I needed you for other things?” 

“What other things?” Gwained piped up. He did not avoid the incoming punch to the shoulder from Arthur.

“Nothing. Gather the knights, Gwaine. We leave now,” the Prince declared.

Arthur swiftly left the quarters, Merlin right behind him like a shadow.

“Yes, my lord,” Gwaine shouted after him, rolling his eyes. “Okay, men, let's get ready to ride!”

…..

At the gates of the Castle, Uther held the device high as he spoke to Arthur and his knights as they were due to depart. 

“With a drop of the druid’s blood, this device will activate and we will finally be able to defeat magic forever. This is the end of an era, and the rise of a new one. A new era in which no one ever had to live in fear of magic again!”

To the knights, the device looked quite small in Uther’s hands. It was circular, and no bigger than the circumference of a quiver. 

Uther handed the device to the druid, who used a sharp rock to slice the tip of his finger. Once a drop of his blood fell upon the device, the shallow carvings upon it lit up and reformed into an arrow, pointing vaguely south.

“As we have agreed,” Uther spoke firmly to the druid, “you are now free. But you are never welcome in Camelot, so leave and never return.”

“Thank you, for your generosity, your highness,” the druid said, his head bowed low to hide his gritted teeth. “I swear, you will never see me or my son again.”

As Uther left to pass the device to his son, the druid hastily sped down the stairs - child in arms - and rushed through the open gates. 

As he passed Merlin, he whispered, “May the stars protect you, Emrys.”

Arthur swung himself up onto his horse, device in hand.

“Knights of Camelot, let us depart,” he announced.

The sound of hooves echoed long after the last knight rode through the castle gates.

…..

The journey was surprisingly quite peaceful. The prince and his men diligently followed the arrow upon the device, riding through light-filled forest and the occasional small village. The party of knights had been riding for at least 3 hours in a mixture of silence and slight idle chatter when suddenly there was a heavy thud.

“Merlin!” Lancelot shouted after the young man who had fallen off his horse.

The knights quickly slipped off their own horses, swiftly crowding around their friend. He lay crumpled and still for a beat before he stirred. All the knights breathed a sigh of relief. And though no one would have seen, Arthur’s eyes softened immediately.

“Are you alright, Merlin?” Leon asked as he propped his torso up tenderly.

“I – I’m alright,” he replied, a little unsure of himself.

Gaius has warned him earlier about side-effects to the spell. Magic was thought to often be the source of a sorcerer’s strength, and that seemed to ring true. Ever since he had sealed most of his power away into the locket, he had felt more tired in less time, less aware of his surroundings. Merlin didn’t want to admit it to himself, but the feeling of being so powerless… it filled him with fear.

“He probably just hasn’t had enough to eat or drink,” Elyan suggested, pulling a flask and a roll of bread out from a bag strapped to his horse. “Perhaps we could all take this as an opportunity to rest for a little and refresh?”

Prince Arthur looked carefully at Merlin, catching his servant’s eye for a split second. In the pit of stomach, he felt a sense of unease. He didn’t know why.

“Alright, men,” he agreed. “Take a little time to drink, eat and stretch out your legs. But then we need to be ready to ride again as soon as we can.”

“Yes, my lord,” the knights chimed in unison.

Once Merlin had sipped at some water and finished the bread that Lancelot had handed them, they resumed their quest. Yet again, the journey was peaceful – no bandits, no wild animals, no villain hell bent on derailing them.

“You’d think the most powerful sorcerer in the world would have at least tried to stop us by now,” Gwaine murmured.

“Why not just be thankful instead of opening your mouth?” Percival remarked.

“I’m just saying, if I were an all powerful guy with magic I would set up every trap to exist and –” 

Gwaine’s words were cut off by the Prince suddenly pulling his horse to a stop.

“We’re here?” he spoke, confusion filling his tone.

Slipping off his mare, the Prince held the device and turned on his heel. He paced around, his eyes focused on the device. No matter how he orientated himself, his hand or the device, the arrow seemed to be pointing to a non-descript grassy area to the side of the woods.

“But, no one’s here,” Leon commented. “Not even a house or even any trace that a person’s been here!”

“Is the device broken?” Lancelot asked.

“Maybe you’re holding it wrong,” Gwaine grinned.

Merlin knew it was time to enact the plan. He peered over Arthur’s shoulder, as if to confirm what the device was showing them.

“Maybe, it’s supposed to show us where to meet the sorcerer,” he suggested slyly. “Magic works in weird ways, maybe the sorcerer will come to us if we stay here?”

Lancelot thought for a second and then shrugged, “Sounds like a good as lead as any.”

“Then we’ll set up camp here for the night,” Arthur spoke. “Let’s hope for that druid’s sake that you're right, Merlin.”

The next hour was spent under the setting sun, with the men preparing to set up camp – gathering firewood, heading into the woods to hunt for some rabbits, or forming tents from the largest branches they could find. Once all the knights had found something to do, Merlin quietly slipped away. He had to find the locket quickly. He still wasn’t entirely sure what we would do when he had found it. 

Perhaps he could cast a simple sleep spell upon Arthur and the knights? Just for a few days until he was sure the druid had fled Camelot. And in that time, he could break the device. Convince the knights that they were tricked by the powerful sorcerer. It wasn’t a great plan, but it was the only plan he had, until he could think of a better one.

“Merlin, what are you doing? I doubt the greatest sorcerer of all time would be buried in the ground.”

Arthur’s voice was full of bemusement. But also a little softer than his usual cutting tone.

“Oh, sorry sire, I was just digging a pit for the fire.”

“You really do only have half a brain, you know that, Merlin? A fire pit doesn’t have to be deep enough to bury a body!”

The prince shook his head and under his breath muttered, “And to think I was worried you’d ended up collapsed somewhere.”

“What did you say, my lord?” Merlin asked, not having catched the last sentence.

“Nothing, Merlin,” the prince spoke. “Just talk to Elyan, he’s got the firewood so you can make actual use of your ‘firepit’.”

“Oh, I will talk to Elyan then,” Merlin said, as Arthur turned and walked towards some of the other knights.

By the time night fell, the knights were eagerly gathered around the fire, fully ablaze, roasting rabbits. They chatted merrily, deep into the dark hours, until most decided to head to sleep. Before long, only a very sleepy Merlin still sat by the glowing embers.

Fighting to keep his eyes open, the young man stumbled as he tried to get back to his feet. This was his best shot, while the knights slept. He needed to find the locket now.

If he concentrated, he could feel the pulse of his magic in the earth. Unfortunately, he couldn’t tell exactly where, but it had to be nearby, right? He tried to follow the sense of magic, but in his fatigue it felt near impossible.

Then, in his head, an idea appeared.

The device! It was a guide directly to his magic, to the locket!

Merlin stumbled over to Arthur’s horse and felt through all the bags for the device, but even after triple checking every one, it was nowhere to be found. It dawned on Merlin, that the prince must have taken the device with him when he retired to sleep.

Of course, it wouldn’t be that easy.

Not to be deterred, Merlin turned and made way towards the prince’s tent. Running on little more than his last energy reserve and sleep-deprived convinced, Merlin descended upon the sleeping Arthur, swiftly feeling through his pockets. 

And there it was. The cool of the metal and the slight warmth of magic radiated from the device through to Merlin’s fingertips. He pulled it out slowly, trying not to stir the prince. Luckily, for Merlin, Arthur barely stirred at all. 

Desperate to find the locket and reunite with his magic, Merlin shuffled out of the tent and held the device aloft. In his hands, it glowed brilliantly, the carvings dancing across the surface. They formed various animals, from eagles to deer and mice to dogs, before forming a bright arrow.

“Finally!” Merlin breathed, following the arrow to a spot several paces from where the fire had now completely burned out. 

On his hands and knees, he tore wildly into the dirt. The pull of his magic was so strong, he couldn’t stop himself now even if he tried. Merlin kept scratching at the dirt until he finally saw the silver of the chain. He yanked the locket out of the ground and clasped it tightly, feeling the pulse of his magic echo through him.

He needed his magic back. It was a deep longing inside of him to be returned whole.

If he hadn’t been so sleep deprived, then his rational brain would have probably stopped him, but at this point it was too late. Without thinking, the sorcerer uttered the incantation to reverse the spell.

For a second, there was a silence.

Then a giant wave of energy crashed outward from the locket, flinging Merlin back, far into the forest and echoing throughout the area with a large boom. 

At the sound, the knights scrambled awake from their sleep, swords drawn. It didn’t take them very long to notice that the device had gone missing.

“Spread out, find the device, find the source of the noise, find anything!” Arthur demanded, cursing himself for trusting the druid.

It must have all been a trap. They had been all lured out to a secluded area and were about to be ambushed.

The knights searched around the camp, peering into the woods.

“Why didn’t anyone stay awake as nightwatch?” Leon mouthed, slight anger in his tone.

“Why didn’t you think of that before we went to bed?” Gwaine disputed.

“Why don’t you both shut up and just focus on searching!” Lancelot added.

The knights’ comments soon descended into a full quarrel. With swords drawn, sleep interrupted and anger rising high, they had almost seemed to have forgotten what they were doing. Suddenly, Elyan’s voice cut in:

“Errr, guys? I found the device but – why is it pointing at Merlin?”

Elyan’s question immediately silenced the knights’ argument.

Arthur rushed immediately to Elyan and his eyes settled upon Merlin, who was leaning against a tree, clutching at his side. And then, the prince’s eyes drifted towards the device. It lay upon the grassy ground, but glowed more violently than it had before. And that bright glowing arrow, pointed directly at Merlin.

“Merlin,” Arthur started, slowly. “Why is the device pointing towards you?”

“I don’t know,” said Merlin, breathless from being flung across the air.

Arthur raised his sword towards the young man.

“Explain yourself, now!” he demanded.

“I said, I don’t know!” Merlin insisted, trying to feign ignorance.

But as he spoke, the hand in which he held the locket began to glow with the gold essence of magic. The glow flowed from the dangling locket, up through the chain and through Merlin’s hand and arm towards his heart. It was his magic returning to him. And it was happening right in front of Arthur.

“Merlin!” Arthur roared. “What is the meaning of this?”

Before Merlin could even speak, Arthur had rushed over to him, sword in hand. With nowhere to go, Merlin was pinned against the tree – the tip of Arthur’s sword resting upon his throat.

The knights rushed towards the commotion, but once they had all gathered they felt unable to interfere. Thoughts rushed through their minds, from feelings of confusion to surprise to fear. They didn’t know what to do.

“You have magic?” the prince spat, his voice flooded with anger. “All this time! You had magic!”

The sorcerer felt the last of his magic return to him as the locket turned cold. He couldn’t find the words to tell Arthur the truth, even though he now knew. 

“Arthur…” he breathed, trailing off when no words could escape his lips.

Rage burned in the prince’s eyes. Betrayal running hot through his blood. He pushed closer towards Merlin, the sword almost breaking skin. As he drew closer, the locket brushed against Arthur’s leg and he jolted slightly.

“Merlin,” Arthur spoke, calm but stern. “You are the most powerful sorcerer in Camelot? Answer me truthfully.”

“Yes,” Merlin answered meekly, staring directly into Arthur’s eyes. “I am.”

“You have magic?” Arthur asked.

“Yes.”

Arthur stared for a long time in silence at the man at the end of his sword. The servant he had come to know and love. A man he trusted just as much as any of his knights, if not more. A man who had hidden from him something almost unforgivable. Almost. 

“Merlin, swear to me that you’ve never used magic to harm Camelot.”

“I swear!”

Prince Arthur lowered his sword and struck his sword into the ground, turning around to look at his knights.

“From now on, anyone who uses magic for the sake of Camelot and not against it, is under my protection,” he cried.

After his declaration, breathing heavily, Arthur turned back towards the camp leaving the knights confused and concerned. Lancelot rushed over to Merlin's side.

“Are you alright, Merlin?” he spoke quickly.

“Yeah, I’m fine, just confused,” he answered, rubbing his neck where the sword had nicked his throat.

“Well, it’s not like he could actually kill you,” Lancelot shrugged. “That man loves you more than any of us.”

“You could kill a puppy in front of him and he’d find an excuse for you,” Gwaine added, pulling Merlin in for a hug. “But how come you never told me, eh? Am I not good enough for the sorcerer supreme?”

“No, I just didn’t th–” Merlin started.

“Shh, I’m only kidding,” Gwaine smiled, ruffling his friend’s hair. “I can’t imagine it's something you could just spit out.”

“So, you’re all fine with me having magic?” Merlin asked nervously.

The rest of the knight shuffled uncomfortably.

“I’ve never known a time in which we haven’t been ordered to destroy magic,” Leon admitted. “But I do know you, Merlin. I know you’re a good and honest man.”

“Yeah, if you were all evil, you would have killed Arthur long ago,” Percival shrugged.

“You’ve saved my life before,” Elyan spoke. “What kind of a knight would I be if I forget that just because you’ve got magic?”

“See,” Lancelot smiled softly. “You are greatly loved. Magic or no magic, it’s all the same. Now, let’s get back home. We’ll figure something out to tell Uther later.”

-----------

As the rest of the knights stood and conversed about their plans to ride back to the castle and convince Uther the plan had failed, Arthur slipped away to take a seat next to his dearest servant.

“Thank you, Arthur,” Merlin spoke softly. “Thank you for trusting in me.”

“Merlin,” Arthur started. “You have been by my side all this time. Even when my father has killed your kind. Even when I had blindly followed his wishes to follow in his footsteps. If, like he said, all magic was evil, then why would you have stayed.”

“Arthur, I–”

“I should be thanking you, Merlin. All this time, you’ve been protecting me, haven’t you?”

“Well, it wasn’t just–”

“You’ve used magic to protect me? And don’t lie to me. I saw it all, when I touched the locket. All the memories of when you had used your magic to save me.”

“...”

“You used magic. For me.”

“Yes.”

“Then how could I ever kill you? How could I ever kill magic?”

“But what about your father?”

“I’ll convince him.”

“But it’ll be hard.”

“I’ll convince him. I have to. If not for you, for every man, woman and child of magic that has been killed because my father was afraid.”

“Arthur, I need you to know; I would never use magic against you, Arthur. Not ever, I swear it.”

“You don’t need to. I believe you.”

Merlin let out a long breath and felt his eyes water.

“Are you crying?” Arthur asked, concerned.

“No, no, I’m just tired,” Merlin spluttered, the last several hours catching up to him. “I just need to sleep.”

The most powerful sorcerer felt his body finally give in to sleep, falling to the left. But before he could hit the ground, Arthur caught him and gently pulled the man’s body towards him, letting Merlin’s head rest on his shoulder. 

“Rest now,” he whispered. “The most powerful sorcerer in the world is forever worthy of sleeping on my shoulder.”

[that-nerd-who-writes-fanfiction]

Inspired by Wish You Were Sober by Conan Grey. I heard the song while I was reading Merthur and got inspired, but this has been sat in a folder of unfinished drafts for a while so do with that what you will.

— Summary —

Two months after Merlin starts working for Arthur, Arthur gets drunk at a feast and Merlin has to take him to bed. Just before this, Arthur dragged Merlin into bed saying it was cold. Merlin offered to light the fire but Arthur held onto him and said no to the fire. Nothing happened, Arthur just wanted a hug, but he’s drunk and Merlin is hesitant to cross boundaries. He agrees at first because “it’s just a hug and Arthur must just be clingy when drunk.” After a few minutes of quiet, this happens.

(Shortened version, I took out a lot to keep it relatively spoiler free if I decide to finish this)

— Preview —

He must’ve been too quiet because Merlin felt Arthur lean into his hair, nose nuzzling into the curls at the crown of his head.

“I think I’m falling in love with you,” Arthur said, his voice barely above a whisper in the empty room.

Merlin startled and ached at the confession. It could never be, and they both knew it.

“You’re drunk, Arthur.” Merlin told him, more sternly than the teasing remarks he’d made earlier, pulling away.

Arthur let him go. Let Merlin break free from him and take a few steps back.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered, the sound cut through Merlin like a spear to hear such resignation from the prince.

It made Merlin pause, a short distance away from the bed.

“It’s fine, what are friends for?” Merlin said, a false happiness forced to mask the ache in his chest.

Arthur wilted, but it was fine. It couldn’t be. Not while he had such a treasonous thing as magic to keep secret. Not while Uther was on the throne.

Not when Arthur was too drunk to hold himself upright, much less know what he was saying. Merlin could never take advantage of that. Even staying to simply sleep, it was more selfish than he could afford to be.

Merlin moved forward, brushing aside the blonde hair that fell into Arthur’s eyes. The prince watched him intently, “Go to sleep,” he muttered, “Sleep off the wine,”

Arthur’s eyes fluttered shut, “I’m sorry,” he whispered again, “Please don’t leave,”

“Never.” Merlin swore, Arthur opened his eyes hopefully. Merlin hesitated before sitting down on the edge of the bed not quite close enough to be pressed to Arthur’s side, “Don’t think I’ll scare so easily, Arthur.” He ran his fingers through blonde hair soothingly, “prat or not, you’re my friend. You’re not getting rid of me that easily.”

“Stay?” He asked hopefully, sounding so soft and more vulnerable than he’d ever seen of the man.

“Get some sleep.” Merlin told him, still met with hopeful eyes he couldn’t lie to. “I’ll be here when you wake up.” He said instead. Lying by omission once again and ignoring the dull ache in his chest.

Arthur nodded and closed his eyes again with a private smile on his lips. Merlin ached as he pulled himself away.

A quick glance over his shoulder as he stood in the doorway told him Arthur had fallen to sleep.

“Goodnight Prat,” he whispered into the room, before he slipped out and made for Gaius’ chambers.

—

Thoughts? Should I finish this?

[stressed-and-queer]

Reasons why Merlins s1 ep4 "The Poisoned Chalice" is one of my favorite episodes (spoilers)

Gaius giving Merlin a fake proverb and Merlin calling him out on it

Merlin: "Someone has to keep the place running"

Gaius: 🤨

Merlin gets so excited he gets to go to the ball and it's adorable

The iconic outfit Arthur picks out for him

Gwen teasing him about the hat

Arthur looking back at Merlin clearly amused

The moment "Clara" confirms that Arthur's cup is poisoned he immediately leaves to save Arthur

Arthur keeps on trying to take a sip of the cup thinking the speech is over only to be interrupted again 🤣

Merlin: *Takes Arthur's cup*

Arthur: #annoyed

Uther asks Merlin for proof about his claims about the cup being poisoned and Arthur immediately goes into protective boyfriend mode

Arthur got so worried when Uther decided he would drink the wine

To the point that he tried to drink it himself knowing there was a possibility it was poisoned.

He was literally willing to do that for a servant he met 4 EP ago

Continuing with the point that they met 4 EP ago, they've known each other for like what, a month at the most and Merlin was already willing to die for Arthur

"but if it's poisoned, he'll die :('

Arthur was so fucking worried when Merlin drank the wine, you could tell just by the way he stood

*Dramatic music playing after Merlin drank the wine for a dramatic pause* Merlin: ...It's fine

The fact that the poison took a few moments to kick in. Idk it made it seem more realistic

You cannot convince me Arthur wasn't planning on somehow getting Merlin back from Bayard

When Merlin starts to choke, Arthur's face immediately drops. There's just a look of pure worry and dread

When Merlin falls to the ground unconscious, Arthur is there by his side in a matter of seconds

Arthur didn't even think twice when he picked Merlin up to carry him to Gaius's physician chambers

Arthur asking if Merlin was going to be ok

Gaius explains how to save Merlin, and how dangerous a journey it would be and Arthur is still willing to go to save Merlin

Gaius: A single drip of venom from the Cockatrice would mean certain death

Arthur: Sounds like fun!

Morgana has so much faith that Arthur would save Merlin she wasn't even worried

She relieved Gwen from her duties for the rest of the night so she could take care of Merlin!!!

"I can't stand by and watch him die!"

" Then don't watch"

The ways those lines are delivered are sooooo good omg

The way Arthur leans against the fireplace

Morgana is the one that convinced Arthur to defy his father and save Merlin

Merlin saying a spell in his sleep

And Gaius having to cover for him because Gwen was literally right there

Gaius immediately knows it's Nimue that poisoned the cup when he finds out the poison has been magically enhanced

"He's just a boy"

"Have you seen your son recently?"

Merlin literally moans Arthur's name in his sleep

"Art-Arthur, Arthur...ngh" -Merlin s1 ep4

Even when Merlin is literally dying and unconscious he's still trying to save Arthur

The whole act that Nimue puts on that Arthur falls for instantly

When Arthur flights the Cockatrice with his sword. I love all the fancy movements Bradley had to learn for the role of Arthur

Merlin moaning Arthur's name pt2

Merlin tries to warn Arthur that it's a trap in his sleep

"Who are you!"

"The last face you'll ever see"

Merlin moans Arthurs name pt3

THE BALL OF LIGHT MERLIN CREATES TO HELP ARTHUR

"Do not let Merlin die because of something I did"

Arthur is willing to be put into the stocks for a month if it means Merlin gets the antidote

Arthur reaching for the flower through the bars of his cell

The way they snuck the flower out of the cell

"That's disgusting, you would be ashamed of yourself you're old enough to be her grandfather"

"I'm proud of you Arthur, never forget that"

Arthur went to check in on Merlin to make sure he was doing ok

"Arthur....thank you"

"You too, get some rest"

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

The Trouble With George | Pt 2

Hi! I love love love your writing so much! If you’re still taking requests, would you maybe do some hurt/comfort with my boy George? Anything will do! (Bonus points if you include Leon but you don’t have to.) If not, thank you for reading this anyway! Xx – anon

Read on Ao3 Part 1

Warnings: canon-typical violence

Pairings: none

Word Count: 1222

The slap rings out in the corridor and Arthur is striding over in the next moment, Merlin and Leon following quickly behind him. There's a momentary intake of breath—the kind that you hear just before tears—and he's around the corner and glaring before anything else can happen.

"My Lord," one of the worst examples of nobility simpers, "how kind of you to—"

Arthur pays absolutely no attention to the slime of a man, instead focusing on the hunched over figure of the servant next to him. He moves forward, nearly bodily shoving the man out of the way to gently cup his elbow. Not in a way to restrain him, something he could easily pull away from if he wished, but to counteract the cruel touch he so obviously did not deserve.

"Are you alright?" he asks with the softest voice he can muster. "May I see, please?"

"S-sire, please, you needn't concern yourself with—"

George. This is George. Arthur takes a deep breath and glances at Merlin, who quickly comes and takes his place, talking softly to him. He turns instead to where Leon is none-too-politely holding the waste-of-space lord back.

"Explain yourself."

The lord flinches at the steel in his tone—good. "M-my Lord, Your Highness, this is but a simple misunderstanding—"

"You've struck someone else and made them cry out in pain. I'm not sure you can classify that as a simple misunderstanding."

"The boy was misinformed about his duties, I was—"

"So you saw fit to strike him and not to explain what it was you wanted him to do?" Arthur tilts his head. "Leon, is that an appropriate way to communicate?"

"No, Your Highness, it is not."

"Do you think we should attempt to communicate that in the same way to you, then?"

The lord pales and wriggles like a worm in Leon's hold—he's not even holding him that tightly. "Please, have mercy, Your Highness, I did not mean any harm!"

"Did you mean to strike him?" The lord whimpers. "Did you?"

"You're scaring him," comes Merlin's voice and he almost turns to say that's the point, but then he sees Merlin holding a shaking George and catches his true meaning.

"Take him," he says to Leon, who nods and begins to escort the lord from the hall, and he turns back to the others. "I'm sorry, George, I didn't mean to frighten you."

"Your apologies honor me, Your—Your Highness," George stammers, and Merlin's hands on his shoulders squeeze, "I am—I—I—"

"Slow down," Merlin bids quietly, "take a breath. It's alright, Arthur's not going to hurt you. You're safe."

"Would it be better if we moved to a chamber somewhere?"

"George, would that be okay?" George takes a moment but nods, and Merlin jerks his head toward one of the other bedchambers close by. "Let's just go in here, okay? It's alright, you can sit down and rest for a while."

Arthur closes the door behind them, standing near the door to let Merlin handle this a little bit more. He averts his gaze to give them greater privacy, wrapping and re-wrapping the thin piece of leather from his gauntlet around his wrist. Leon will handle the rest of the lord's mess, he knows, there is nothing here for him to do except help reassure George that he will not be punished, nor suffer no consequences for the injustice that was just dealt to him. He knows his authority doesn't exactly ingratiate him to servants at the best of times, but it needn't make him more of a threat in this moment.

"That's it," Merlin's muttering, "you're alright now. Come, let me see—there. Okay. It doesn't look like it'll be anything long-lasting. I can get you something from Gaius if you want for—"

"No, no, please, it's not that bad." George glances up at Arthur and then quickly away. "I will be fine to resume my normal duties."

"You could be better than fine, though."

"It's…it's not that much of a bother."

"You're hurting, George," Arthur says as gently as he can, "it's not a bad thing to want to hurt less."

George glances at him. They hold eye contact for a moment before George carefully raises a hand to his face to feel the injured skin, closing his eyes and breathing in shakily.

"I do not know what I did wrong," he mumbles, "I…I do not know what I could've done better."

"It's not your fault. It's not," Merlin says firmly when George lets out a small noise of disbelief, "it's not your fault for not knowing what to do when someone won't talk to you. You can't be expected to read someone's mind."

"I do not like being hit," he says in a truly small voice and Arthur's chest clenches.

"I wouldn't imagine anyone likes to be hit." Merlin takes something out of his pocket and dabs it lightly over George's cheek. "He won't hit you again."

"He will ask for another servant—"

"He won't have the chance," Arthur says, "he's being asked to leave Camelot at next light. None but his own servants will handle him until he is outside city walls."

"N-no, Your Highness, you needn't—not on my account—"

"None may mistreat any person in this castle," he says firmly, "he would be treated the same if you were a knight or another courtesan."

"If I were a knight I could strike him back," George says bitterly, and then looks panicked at what he just said, only for Merlin to laugh.

"You could've, and I'd pay to see it."

"There is nothing wrong with defending yourself," Arthur agrees, "and you needn't fear retribution from any knight who serves Camelot."

George lets out a low breath and Merlin kneels up to give him a hug. Arthur turns away again to give the two them privacy, closing his eyes just to take solace that someone is able to give George comfort in this moment. Soft and quiet murmurings come as the two of them have their own conversation. He has no desire to know about them in detail, only what he can do with his station to help.

There's a quiet knock on the door and he slips through, seeing Leon returning. Leon's glove is slightly askew on his hand and he fixes it with not a hitch to his breath nor voice. Arthur allows himself a small smile.

"Is he on his way out?"

"He was quite suddenly struck by an obligation in another place," Leon says evenly, "and will be leaving post-haste."

"Such an obligation would likely keep him away for quite a while, wouldn't it?"

"For the foreseeable future, yes."

"What a shame."

"Truly a pity. He will not be able to attend any of the tournaments or feasts for the next year."

"And what a loss that is."

"Indeed."

(George is taken to Gaius, Merlin goes with him, and Arthur goes to ensure the slimeball of a lord is really sure this obligation will keep him from ever coming back to Camelot.)

[kissme-withyour-cherrylipstick]

what’s your favorite merlin ep from each season?

Ooh yay, good question! I don't have these already picked out so I will be giving it a think!

Season 1: I'm gonna have to go with the Moment of Truth. Thought I was gonna go with the Poisoned Chalice, but then I saw MoT on the list and realized it had to be that. There's just so much good in it. It does such a wonderful job of establishing how at home Merlin has become in Camelot, all his friends come to help him, Gwen and Morgana are awesome 😍 And of course all the Merthur stuff. When Arthur asks if Merlin has found a place where he fits in? 😭 Hunith absolutely shipping them? But what really tips this one over the edge for me is Will. I love him so much. He's such a good character, even though he's only in one episode. He's Merlin's best friend!!!! I have put a lot of thought and fanfic into what they must have been like together in Ealdor. Merlin being in the middle of the conflict between Arthur and Will.......... Ugh I could go on but this is already long 😅 And Dr. Bashir as Kanen is always fun 🤣

Season 2: The Last Dragonlord. My favorite episode of the whole series. I love Balinor sooooooooo much. He is just so. How do I put this into words? He's so harsh when we first meet him, but he is willing to help. There's a gentleness to him that has been hardened by years of intense persecution and grief. He's the last of his kind, just like Kilgharrah 😭 He's so lonely and expects nothing from Merlin, but then..........KASJDFIHALKSJAJD;LJAKJSDASJFDSK. Him and Merlin! All their scenes are so good!!!!! When Merlin says "We could be happy," my heart is destroyed. They got no time with each other!!!!! He would have been so good for Merlin!!!! And the little dragon he whittles for Merlin?? 😭😭😭 I am not okay. AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON HUNITH AND BALINOR. ROMANCE OF ALL TIME. Tolkien level love story. But so tragic. Again, I have spent a lot of time and fanfic thinking about what could have been.

Season 3: The Coming of Arthur, part 2 if I have to pick. One word: Mercelot. Merlin with the sword and Lancelot there and Merlin showing off 😭😭😭 THEM. lakjdlkajlkdjskfasjlkdslkjsalkja. It's also a really good episode and so cool to see the round table and everybody becoming knights. One of the episodes of all time. Honorary mention to The Sorcerer's Shadow. Merlin and Gilli have such an interesting dynamic.

Season 4: Some personal favorites in this season, but I gotta go with The Secret Sharer. Everybody is WORKING in this episode. Agravaine has finally gone too far and it almost breaks Merlin and Arthur 😭 Ugh that scene in the council chambers. "He would not have left without saying goodbye to me." Just kill me now. And then way Gwen is there to check on Merlin 😭 And then Gwaine! GWAINE!!!! A great Merwaine episode. He got bored of playing soldiers! He's really just here for Merlin!! The way Merlin is so dismissive of him at first! But then he helps him and the deleted scene!! And then of course all the Emrys stuff with the Catha is so cool. I'm a bit of a Gaius hater, but I love his relationship with Merlin and it's so strong and good in this one. And then what Gaius says to Arthur at the end 🥲 I'm fine.

Season 5: The Diamond of the Day, part 2. I feel like I don't really need to explain this one? You get it.

Wow okay all my picks are quite sad. What could this possibly say about me.

[larluce]

Arthur and Merlin travel back in time without knowing the other is from the future too AU (SERIES 2)

FIRST PART (SERIES 1) >> PREVIOUS PART >> NEXT PART

In "The Nightmare Begins"

In Arthur's chambers.

Merlin: (enters, shyly) Uhm, hi.

Arthur: (stands up from his bed quickly) Hi! you... finished Gaius chores.

Merlin: Yeah.

Silence.

Arthur: (nervous) Uhm... Are you... going to undress me or-

Merlin: Right! Sure, because that's my job. Obviously. That's why I'm here. (stands infront of Arthur, blushing, but doesn't make any other movement)

Arthur: (looks at him, tenderly) Merlin you have done this thousands of times, you don't have to act all shy.

Merlin: (blushes more furiously) I'm not acting shy I'm waiting for you to lift your arms, you idiot!

Arthur: (blushes) Oh... of course (lifts his arms)

Merlin: (starts putting Arthur's shirt off with trembling hands)

Arthur: (feels Merlin's fingers brushing his skin having no so good thoughts)

Merlin: (finishes to put Arthur's shirt off) Th-there. (avoids Arthur's gaze)

Arthur: (keeps looking at him still having no so good thoughts)

Merlin: (dares to look up)

Arthur and Merlin: (get loss in each other's eyes and then look at each other's lips)

Merlin: (snaps out of it, thinking) My magic! I can't lose control of my magic!

Arthur: (snaps out of it, thinking) He said he wanted to go slow. SLOW, Arthur!

Merlin: You-your trousers.

Arthur: (fearing he'll have a boner if Merlin changes his trousers) Uh...I rather put those on myself.

Merlin: (in relief) Oh, thank the gods! (realises his slip up) I mean, less work for me, yay! (goes to the door that conects to his chambers quickly)

Arthur: Merlin.

Merlin: (stops and turns around)

Arthur: (goes to him, holds his hand tenderly, smiling like a fool) Good night.

Merlin: (smiling like a fool too) Good night.

Another silence. Merlin start swinging their hands.

Arthur: Merlin?

Merlin: Yeah?

Arthur: We have to... let go.

Merlin: Yeah, we should do that.

Another silence.

Arthur: (chuckles) You are still not letting go.

Merlin: (chukles too) You neither!

Arthur: (brings Merlin's hand to his lips and kisses it) Good night. (finally lets go of his hand)

Merlin: (off guard, with a very high pitched voice) Good...Good night! (enters his chambers and closes the door quickly)

That is just the first night after confessing their feelings to one another. Merlin screams in a pillow after that and Arthur sleeps hugging a pillow with a smile plastered on his face.

The next day, is pretty much the same, with Merlin and Arthur acting all ackward around the other, but constantly smiling for no reason, together or not. It reaches the point Merlin puts Arthur's clothes on wrong twice and Uther scolds Arthur in a meeting for being too distracted staring at his manservant. Of course, everyone notice this change and new rumors spread, saying that the Prince sudden change of humor was due to Merlin finally accepting to bed him. But for once Merlin can care less about what they say. His so long believed impossible love, loves him back! He is living his dream! There is nothing that could ruin that!

Then the second night comes and Merlin's little bubble of happiness beggins to shatter.

That night, Merlin has one of those strange dreams he's been having since he travel back in time. He can't move and can't see a thing in those, there are no images, but rather sounds and feelings. Sometimes he's warm, sometimes he's cold, sometimes he feels the breeze or water showering him, like rain. There are sounds of animals. Normally birds singing. But mostly there is always a voice talking to him.

"I'm not the best at prune. You'll have to settle. Not that you can complain anyway" Sometimes the voice is happy.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry!" sometimes the voice is sad.

But lately, for some reason, the strange voice has been sounding more like one he knows very well.

The voice sounds like Arthur's.

An the dream Merlin has this night is not the exception.

"I love you" the voice says this time, but instead of sounding joyful and tender like when Arthur actually confessed his love to him, it sounds broken, as if the true of those words were killing him. "I love you and I hate you, so, so much. All the secrets you kept from me, Merlin. I've forgiven them all but one. Of all the moments you could have... Why didn't you say it before? Why didn't you keep it to yourself? Why..."

Merlin wakes up in the middle of the night, with tears rolling down his eyes. That was a cruel blow of reality. A premonition even. The secrets, the fucking secrets! He has been so happy since he and Arthur confessed their love to one another that he forgot Arthur not knowing about his magic means that Arthur still doesn't know all of him. Will Arthur still love him once he knows? Merlin still remembers how Arthur reacted in his other life. Though Arthur eventually came around, the memory of the initial rejection still hurts him in his very core. He doesn't want to experiment it again, not so soon when he's beginning to be happy. He doesn't know what he did or what changed for this Arthur to fall in love with him. And for the same reason, he doesn't want to risk it, he doesn't want to lose him! He knows he must tell Arthur, but... Is it bad that he wants to be a bit selfish?

Suddenly a scream gets him out of his thoughts.

Merlin: (alarmed) Arthur! (runs to Arthur's chambers)

In Arthur's chambers.

Arthur: (looking around, frantic and shouting) Merlin! Merlin! MERLIN!

Merlin: (enters running) I'm here! I'm here! What happened?

Arthur: (pulls Merlin till he's sit on the bed and starts checking him, touching him everywhere, even more frantic)

Merlin: (very worried, though he still blushes) Arthur,wait-What are you-Stop it- ARTHUR!

Arthur: (Stops, his hands holding Merlin's face, still with fear in his eyes)

Merlin: (comforts) It was a nightmare (puts a hand on Arthur's) Just a nightmare.

Arthur: (suddenly breaks down and cries)

Merlin: (holds him, wanting to protect Arthur from whatever was tormenting him. His heart aching with each sob, while he comforts him) It's alright. It wasn't real. It's alright.

Arthur: (pulls Merlin away just enough to see his face) Merlin.

Merlin: Yes?

Arthur: (begs) Don't leave me, please.

Merlin: I won't. Never.

Arthur: (kisses Merlin abruptly)

Merlin: (startles but soon kisses back)

The way Arthur kisses Merlin is not tender this time, not even passionate, but rather driven by full need. Need to feel Merlin, need to make sure Merlin is there and still with him. Soon Merlin is also lying on the bed and Arthur is on top of him kissing him more deeply. Merlin moans against Arthur's lips, his hands on Arthur's naked back and Merlin thinks he'll go isane. Why did he even deny himself this?

Then he hears movement, opens his eyes and notices some things floating around the room and he remembers why.

Merlin: (puts a hand between their chests and pushes to separate their kiss and says, breathless) Arthur.

The things fall and the sound makes Arthur get out of whatever trance he was.

Merlin: (thinking some explanation for the things falling) Uh-

Arthur: (Doesn't even acknowledge the things falling and gets off Merlin quickly, very ashamed of himself) Oh, Gods! I'm so sorry. I wasn't-I just-

Merlin doesn't have the chance to say anything cause a guard suddenly opens the door.

Guard: Sire, the- (notices Merlin is on the bed) Uh, forgive me, I didn't mean to interrupt-

Merlin: (too quickly) No! It's perfectly fine.

Arthur: (too quickly) Yeah, we just finished.

Guard: (thinking) I didn't need to know that...

Arthur: What is it that you came?

Guard: Is the lady Morgana. There was a fire in her chambers.

Arthur and Merlin: WHAT?! (Stand up quickly and run outside)

Time skip. In the morning, after they finished investigating Morgana's chambers. Arthur and Uther walking through the corridor.

Arthur: It's not possible. There are too many guards. I'm telling you, it was a thunder.

Uther: No. Someone started the fire with magic. I'm sure of it. Arrest all those we have under suspicion.

Arthur: I can't arrest people without solid proof-

Uther: You can and you will. My ward has been attacked. I won't give them the chance to attack again. (leaves)

Arthur: (sighs)

Meanwhile. In Gaius' Tower. Merlin spying on Gaius and Morgana from outside.

Morgana: (cover in a blanket, still pretty shaken) It happened so quickly. It was terrifying.

Gaius: (puts a hand on her shoulder) It's alright. You're safe now.

Morgana: ...

Gaius: Is there something you like to tell me, my child?

Morgana: ...No.

Merlin: (thinking, confused) How weird. She confided Gaius she believed she caused the fire before, why isn't she doing it now? (enters) I brought the herbs.

Morgana: (tenses)

Gaius: Just what I needed. (to Morgana) I'll have a remedy for your nerves in no time, my child.

Morgona: Thank you. (stands up quickly) I'll go (passes Merlin fast and leaves)

Merlin: (very serious) It was magic. Uther can be unreasonable when its comes to magic sometimes, but he's not dumb. And neither is Morgana.

Gaius: Merlin-

Merlin: Her dreams are visions, you've known that for a while and that's an hability only users of magic could have. She did this and you know it.

Gaius: She's better not knowing.

Merlin: NO! Not knowing it's what's tearing her apart! She needs to be told that she'll be okay, that her power is not something she should be afraid of. She needs... (trails off)

Gaius: What, Merlin?

Merlin: She needs guidance. Someone that can help her control her gift. Like me.

Gaius: No, Merlin. You can't!

Merlin: I'm not asking you.

Gaius: Are you out of your mind!

Merlin: You can't drug her and make her believe she's going insane for the rest of her life!

Gaius: Your magic must stay secret!

Merlin: Secrets be damned! You don't keep secrets from the people you love! It's always a lie, after lie, and then one day everything will blow in our faces and there's nothing we'll be able to do to repair the damage!

Gaius: ...

Gaius: This is not just about Morgana, is it?

Merlin: (sighs) My magic keeps acting on its own when Arthur and I kiss.

Gaius: Your magic is linked to your emotions, my boy. It's normal. Once the initial excitement has cooled off-

Merlin: It's not just that! I can't keep my magic a secret from Arthur anymore! It's not fair to him. (sinks in a chair) I shouldn't have started anything romantic with him without telling him in the first place! (sinks his face on his hands) He'll hate me now.

Gaius: What do you mean "now"? (pauses and then opens his eyes wide in realisation) Merlin, are you planning to tell Arthur? I thought you were going to wait until he is king!

Merlin: (gets his hands of his face) That was before we became... lovers (blushes, but then sighs, kind of defeated) I can't have our relationship be based on lies.

Gaius: Your magic has nothing to do with your relationship.

Merlin: It has everything to do with it! I don't just have magic, I am magic and he deserves to know who he's giving his heart to.

Gaius: (sighs)

Merlin: This is the part when you tell I'm crazy and I shouldn't even think about doing this.

Gaius: Actually, I think you should tell Arthur too.

Merlin: WHAT?! 😨

Gaius: Not for the same reasons you are saying though. I'll feel more at easy knowing you have Arthur's full protection.

Merlin: Let me get this straight. You think telling Morgana, who actually has magic, is insane, but telling the Prince of Camelot himself is more than fine?

Gaius: He almost started a rebellion against his own father for you. That's more than enought proof for me that he wouldn't let any harm come to you. In the worst case scenario, he'll send you away for your own protection, but I vehemently believe even that is pretty unlikely.

Merlin: It's not banishment I fear or that he wouldn't forgive me. I know he would eventually. (His eyes water) But what if he doesn't want to be with me after I tell him? What if he doesn't love me anymore? (Tears run down his eyes) I don't think I can't go back to being his friend. Not now that I know how it feels to be loved by him.

Gaius: Oh, Merlin. (Holds him)

Merlin: (crying) I love him so much, I don't want to lose him. (Keeps crying)

Arthur: (enters) Gaius, I need-Merlin! 😨(Runs to him, concerned) What happened?!

Merlin: (snifs and wipe his tears) It's nothing.

Arthur: It's not nothing. You are crying! (makes a move to put a hand on his shoulder)

Merlin: (stands up quickly, evading him) I'm fine.

Arthur: Merlin-

Merlin: I have chores to do. (leaves)

Arthur: Merlin! (makes a move to go after him)

Gaius: (stops him) Better leave him alone. He'll come to you when he's ready to talk.

Arthur: (even more worried) Is... is this about last night?

Gaius: (confused) Last night?

Arthur: Gaius, I swear to you I didn't mean to cross his boundaries. I don't know what came over me when we kissed-

Gaius: Sire, as much as I appreciate the trust you have on me to tell me some things, I rather not be informed in whatever is that you do with my ward in private.

Arthur: But-

Gaius: Shh!

Arthur: I-

Gaius: No! Do not involve me! I will not be an intermediary between you and Merlin. You two solve your things on your own.

Arthur: (sighs in defeat) Alright.

Gaius: Now. What is that brought you here, your Highness?

Arthur: My father insists the fire in Morgana's chambers was started by sorcery, so... I need names.

Gaius: (his face changes) Oh... I see... (sighs) I'll write down all the suspects I can think of for you, my lord.

Arthur: Thank you.

Gaius: (starts writing down names in a parchment)

Arthur: (looks angry as he does it)

Gaius: (notices and decides to test him) You don't seem particulary happy about this decision, Sire.

Arthur: I'm not. But I can't disobbey the King.

Gaius: But you think the king is wrong?

Arthur: (thinks for a moment before answering) Even if his suspicion were true, arresting everyone suspected of doing sorcery is unjust. Is like arresting everyone that has a sword just because someone was run through with one.

Gaius: (nods and finishes to write) From what I recall, everyone in here had contact with druids or sorcereres at some point, Sire. Geoffrey should have the record of more and their whereabouts, especially the names of the relatives of executed sorcerers in the last years.

Arthur: Thank you again, Gaius, for your service.

Gaius: (gives Arthur the parchment) Once you finish collecting all the names you need, be careful where you put the list, Sire. It would be a shame if someone got a hold of it... and gave the suspects a head start.

Arthur: (catches the message and smiles) I understand. (takes the parchment) I'll keep that in mind. (leaves)

Gaius: (thinking, smiling) They will be fine.

Time skip. In a corridor. Arthur aproaches Merlin.

Arthur: Merlin!

Merlin: (thinking) Shit! (says) Do you need something, my lord?

Arthur: No, don't call me "my lord". Not now. You've been avoinding me all day.

Merlin: (hangs his head) I'm sorry.

Arthur: (sighs) No, it's me who should apologize. Merlin, last night I... (trails off as he notices Merlin is carring some flowers)

Merlin: (nervous, thinking maybe Arthur did notice the things floating around) Right... Arthur, I need to tell you some-

Arthur: Why are you carring those flowers?

Merlin: (looks the flowers) Oh, they are for Morgana. You know, to cheer her up after the fire-

Arthur: (angry) You are bringing flowers for Morgana?

Merlin: (confused) Yes? Is that...bad?

Arthur: (sarcastic) No, it's fine. Totally fine. You gifting a girl flowers. Why would that be bad?

Merlin: It's not like that. Why are you... wait... (smiles in disbelief) You are jealous?

Arthur: (still angry, but blushes) No.

Merlin: You are!

Arthur: Stop smiling! I'm not jealous, but if I were I'll have every right to! You avoided me all day and when I finally find you you are giving a token of your affections to someone else!

Merlin: (now angry too) It's not a "token of my affections". I was just being nice. I told you, I wanted to cheer her up after the fire. Because that's what friends do.

Arthur: Really? Because we've been friends for more than a year and you've never given me any flowers.

Merlin: There was never a fire in your chambers!

Arthur: Right. 🙄

Merlin: (offended) What are you saying? That you think I'm cheating on you?

Arthur: What? No!

Merlin: I can't believe you! We've only been together for 2 days and a half and you already think that low of me? (looks hurt)

Arthur: No! I would never-

Leon: (enters) Sire, the King wants to know if... Uhm... Did I interrumpt something?

Merlin: (turns to Leon with a polite smile) No at all, Sir Leon, you just missed the part when giving flowers to a friend means I'm a whore. (turns around and walks away at a furious pace)

Arthur: I never said that. Merlin!

Merlin: (already gone)

Leon: I'm assuming your apology didn't go well, Sire.

Arthur: Shut up.

Time skip. At night. In Morgana's chambers. Morgana sitting on the bed while Gwen finishes to arranged the room.

Gwen: Oh, I almost forgot. (points the vase with the flowers) Merlin brought this for you.

Morgana: (very surprised) He... did?

Gwen: Why so surprised?

Mogana: (forces a smile) Oh, I just thought he wouldn't dare. With how jealous Arthur can be.

Gwen: They did get into a fight for that. (giggles) Their first couple fight, can you believe it?

Morgana: Uhm.

Gwen: (worried, thinking) She's not even asking for the details. She must be really upset. (sits on the bed next to her and says) I can stay if that would make you feel better.

Morgana: You've done so much already.

Gwen: I don't mind.

Morgana: I thought you were going on a date with Lancelot tonight.

Gwen: I canceled.

Morgana: Gwen-

Gwen: My duty to you is first. (puts a hand on hers) You are not only my Lady. You are my friend.

Morgana: (smiles, her eyes watering with emotion) Thank you. (looks the candles in the room) Can you... take the candles out?

Gwen: Of course. (takes the candles out of the room and then comes back)

Morgana: (lies on the bed leaving a space for Gwen)

Gwen: (lies on the bed next to Morgana)

Morgana: (cuddles with her) I'm scared.

Gwen: A thunder can't strike in the same place twice. You're safe.

Morgana: Not of the fire. My nightmares are getting worse day by day. Telling me horrible things about everything and everyone. And it's getting to the point I... (trail off)

Gwen: What?

Morgana: (tears roll down her eyes) I don't know who to trust anymore.

Time skip. The next day. In Arthur's chambers.

Arthur: (about to enter)

Merlin: (opens the door just when he's about to enter) Oh... hi.

Arthur: Hi...(notices Merlin is carring his chainmail) You are just cleaning that? I told you to do it yesterday.

Merlin: Sorry, I was too busy collecting flowers.

Arthur: (sighs) Merlin, I'm sorry, alright? I never meant to-

Merlin: No, really. Look. (gets out of the door frame so Arthur enters and points the vases full of flowers in the room) I... picked them myself. (blushes)

Arthur: (enters, looking around in awe. The flowers are everywhere!)

Merlin: (puts the chainmail aside) I still think you were jealous obnoxious prat (crosses his arms, angry, but soon softens his expression, blushing) But it's true I haven't had any romantic gesture with you. And you had so many with me... I didn't want to be left behind.

Arthur: (walks to one of the vases and touches the flowers delicately)

Merlin: I know this can't compare to a horse, but-

Arthur: I love it. (turns to Merlin with a big emotional smile) It's perfect.

Merlin: Really? 🥺

Arthur: (laughs softly and holds Merlin's hands tenderly) Really. The most beautiful gift I ever been given.

Merlin: 😍

Arthur: It's also the cheesiest gift I ever been given.

Merlin: You are one to talk! Sir "I got you a purple lily in a pot so it doesn't die".

Arthur: (laughs but then his face changes to worry) Wait, you said you picked them ALL yourself?! 😨 That's too many plants! Are you okay? (holds Merlin by his upper arms)

Merlin: (blushes more) Eh...Yeah, collecting herbs for Gaius it's barely a sting now. This was nothing.

Arthur: (his eyebrows still frowing in concern)

Merlin: (moved by his worry, takes Arthur's hands off his arms gently, but doesn't let go of them) I really am fine.

Arthur: (smiles, more calm) Alright.

Silence.

Arthur: (smiling like a fool) We are... still holding hands.

Merlin: (smiling like a fool too) I know.

Arthur: Do you... want to let go?

Merlin: No.

Arthur: Me neither. But I need this one (lets go of one of Merlin's hands) to give you this (gets a parchment out of his pocket)

Merlin: (takes it) What's this?

Arthur: It's a list of everyone suspected of consorting with sorcerers, witches or druids. Names and last known dwelling places. It's all there.

Merlin: (his face falls) Oh... right. Why are you giving it to me?

Arthur: I don't know what my father will do to suspects once I arrest them, so... I want you to give them a warning before I gather the men to go after them.

Merlin: (in utter shock) You... want me... to help them escape?

Arthur: I know it's a great risk and you probably won't be able to reach them all. Putting you in danger it's the last thing I want. (puts his free hand between Merlin's shoulder an neck) But you are also the only person I trust with this task.

Merlin: (a pang of pain in his heart) Trust?

Arthur: And with my life, to be honest. There's no one I trust more than you.

Merlin: (lets go of him and steps back, the parchment falling to the floor)

Arthur: (frowns) What is it?

Merlin: You shouldn't.

Arthur: What?

Merlin: I haven't been honest with you.

Arthur: Merlin-

Merlin: No! You've been so good to me. It's not fair I haven't been corresponding you in the same way. (his eyes water) Since we started this, us, you've given all of yourself, while I've just been giving you pieces. I should have let you in from the start, I know I should, but I couldn't. I was so scared, I didn't want you to hate me. But thats's also selfish. You deserve more, Arthur, you deserve-

Arthur: Are you leaving me?! 😨

Merlin: What? No!

Arthur: (gives a sigh of relief and brings a hand to his chest) Don't scare me like that!

Merlin: I would never leave you, Arthur... But you may want to leave me after I tell you this. (takes a breath) Arthur-

Arthur: I know.

Merlin: (very surprised) You do?

Arthur: And I understand completely. This is your very first relationship, it's normal that you are not ready for doing some things.

Merlin: ... What? 😧

Arthur: (takes his hands, lovinly) Merlin, I would never force you to do anything you don't want to do.

Merlin: Arthur, that's not-

Arthur: What happened that night, I was affected by my nightmare, but that's no excuse. I acted out of line and for that I sincerely apologize. I'm more than okay with going slow. Truly.

Merlin: (thinking, teary eyes, moved) Why do you have to be this sweet now? You are making this even more difficult! (sighs, thinking) Well, This will have to do... (says) Arthur, I need you to look into my eyes closely and to not stop looking at them, no matter how scared you are.

Arthur: (confused) Why would I be scared?

Merlin: Just do it. Please.

Arthur: (does it)

Merlin: (lets go of Arthur's hands and puts his hands together) Gewyrcan lif. (his eyes turn gold and he opens his hands, a butterfly flying out of them)

Arthur: (between in shock and mesmerized, because he has never watched Merlin doing magic so closely before and it's so beautiful he thinks he'll fall in love all over again)

Merlin: (evades his gaze as soon as he finishes, too ashame, too scared, preparing himself for Arthur's rejection and yet not wanting to recieve it) I… I have magic (tears roll down his eyes) I'm a sorcerer. But I only use my magic for you, Arthur. Only for you. Please, don't hate me-

Arthur: (aproches) Merlin-

Merlin: (steps back, shaking) I was born with it, I didn't have a choice, I swear! I couldn't tell you, but you deserved to know. That's the only thing I kept from you. Everything else is truth! My feelings are truth! I'm still me, I'm still the same person you knew. Please, believe me-

Arthur: (reaches him and lifts his chin so Merlin looks at him in the eye)

Merlin: (flinches, but doesn't move away)

Arthur: You told me to not stop looking at your eyes.

Merlin: (confused, tears still rolling down his eyes and a vulnerable expression on his face) What?

Arthur: I don't hate you. I could never hate you. The only think I hate right now is that you seem so scared... of me. (his eyes watering) You flinched from my touch for the first time and that should never be. You should never feel unsafe around me.

Merlin: I...

Arthur: (smiles) Thank you for trusting me with this. It mustn't have been easy for you. And you have nothing to fear. I won't tell anybody, your secret it's safe with me.

Merlin: (dumbfounded) You... forgive me?

Arthur: (gives a teary laugh) There's nothing to forgive! We are in a kingdom where magic is outlawed. I can't hardly blame you for keeping it secret. (thinking) And yet I did before. And I'm so sorry it took me so long to understand. I'm so sorry, Merlin.

Merlin: (daring to hope) And... you... still love me?

Arthur: (cups his face with one hand lovinly) I love you. All of you. You having magic doesn't change a thing.

Merlin: (breaks down in a crying mess because this was more than he ever bargained for and he's so relieved and so happy, and also so scared none of this is true, because it's too good to be true)

Arthur: (hugs him, protective. His heart breaking for Merlin and furious with the world that made him live in fear for so long) It's alright. You're safe with me. I won't let anything happen to you. You are safe.

Merlin: (still not believing it) You love me!

Arthur: I love you. Everything is alright.

Merlin: (pulls away a little and kisses him suddenly)

Arthur: (startles, but soon kisses back)

Merlin: (turns the kiss more desperate, his hands curling in Arthur's shirt)

Arthur: (separates the kiss, with labor breaths, but still holding Merlin close) Wait, you're vulnerable now. I don't want to take advantage of you.

Merlin: I want to. I really want to. I was just holding back because of my magic.

Arthur: (confused) What are you-

Merlin: (begs) Kiss me. Show me that you love me. Please.

Arthur: (kisses Merlin passionately)

And Merlin knows everything it's alright because Arthur still loves him. Arthur accepts him wholy. Everything is alright.

...

Do you remember that the very first part of this AU said that Arthur confessed he always knew about Merlin's magic and that he is from the future shortly after Merlin confessed he is a sorcerer? Well, let's say it's not going to be that shortly after anymore for drama and plot purposes 😅

I hope you liked this magic revealed. 😊

I'm not done with "The Nightmare Begins". There's still Morgana. What do you think her dreams where about? What does she knows? Find out in the next part of "Merlin: IT WAS ABOUT FUCKING TIME"

Tagging @aceauthorcatqueen , @fallenxjas , @smileytrinity ,@lucifertookmyshoe , @an-entity-i-think , @thecornerofbelu , @griffonskies , @odinjm , @cinnabon-sweetroll-tiramisu , @thelady-mary , @bennedict , @nightninjaboy , @st8-of-grace , @starrieisdelusional , @error-username-not-available , @dogberryrowan , @jamieweasley13 , @tansyuduri , @tercais , @robynnemrys , @evadne01 , @serasvictoria02 , @hairdryerducks , @curiously-lazy , @harriettesthings , @andrealux16 , @wacko-weirdo , @greatdonutenemy , @yougottobekittenme , @anxiousosaurus , @kinkforwings , @someweirdassnamee , @impracticalantlers , @miyriu , @hobipabo , @whitemaskcd , @bogslob , @braziiis , @rubinaitoart

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"Gaius! I've been meaning to ask you-"

"Do you know how lucky you are? I managed to pull some strings to get you released."

Well that's not gonna work. He's annoyed and rightfully so. And normally you'd feel worse, but the curiosity is eating at you.

"Thank you but-"

He glares at you. You shrink back and lord that eyebrow is intimidating.

"That doesn't mean it was free."

You feel a sinking feeling in your gut.

"...what do you mean by that?"

---

"OW-"

Oh how fun! You're getting pelted by children with rotten vegetables. You spot Gaius laughing at you on the sidelines. At least someone's having fun.

"Thanks!" You shout in his direction. It's muffled by the kids laughter.

You're still grateful to gaius. And feel a bit bad.

Not grateful enough to eat rotten tomato that got in your mouth ew, ew, ew-

As the children pause their tormenting to get more ammo, you start trying to frantically get the taste out of you mouth and are approached by a girl in a red cloak and curly hair.

"I'm Guinevere, but most people call me Gwen. I'm the Lady Morgana's maid."

Oh. That's interesting, wonder why she's here?

You engage in a lovely conversation. She's sweet, if a bit awkward. She laughs when you tell her what exactly you said to Arthur, and leaves when the children are back.

With more rotten vegetables. Fun.

But hey, maybe you've finally made a friend?

---

You're back in gaius's chambers when you remember your earlier conversation. There's food set on the table already, and you both pick up utensils to start eating.

"Do you want some vegetables with that?" Gaius asks you, sounding amused.

---

[justaz]

merlin convincing morgana to remain in camelot and bonding over magic. uther dies and arthur becomes king and merlin and morgana are eager for arthur to repeal the ban but it never happens. then arthur and gwen are courting and morgana and merlin are a bit upset but are happy for them (sorta) but mainly they’re waiting for the ban to be repealed. it never happens. then gwen and arthur get married and morgana and gwen (+ lancelot) are devastated but hanging on by a thread for the magic ban to be repealed. it never happens. morgana is growing angrier and angrier while merlin is growing more and more reckless. morgana picks fights with arthur while merlin sticks to the shadows and protects arthur from unseen threats like always but he stops putting up much of a fight. he keeps coming back beaten black and blue, bloodied, on the brink of death.

morgana finally snaps at merlin and is like “i’ve been waiting for the ban to be lifted like you promised it would be and nothings changed. i cannot stay in this kingdom and watch the love of my life be happy with my brother while hiding myself away! you can be fine with the lying and hiding but i’m done! i’ll make my own damn happy ending” and storms off to flee camelot. lancelot finds merlin and they talk about it and lancelot is like “honestly, she has a point. i’m in love with gwen and that’ll never change. it pains me to see them so happy even though i wish nothing but the best for them. the only reason i’m still in camelot is you, merlin. if you want to stay, i’ll stay with you. if you want to go, then we’ll go.” merlin unsure and lance goes “it was you and me in the beginning, it can be you and me again” and merlin tears up but is still unsure and lance compromises with “we don’t have to leave forever. just a month or two, a year or five. however long you need.”

merlin finally agrees and lancelot goes to pack while merlin finds gwaine and tells him his plan bc if he doesn’t tell gwaine then the man will hunt him down like a bloodhound. gwaine ofc immediately agrees to go with him and they all pack their things. merlin shuffles into arthur’s chambers and turns in his resignation from his service and arthur starts freaking out like “wait what?? what’s wrong?? what happened??? let me fix it. was it a nobleman? a knight? was it me?? please tell me it wasn’t me. what happened??” and merlin can’t handle it so he just restates that he’s resigning, bows and says it was somewhat of an honor, and then turns and leaves. he finds lance and gwaine in gaius’s chambers with mordred. merlin rolls his eyes but is also kinda grateful for his friends. arthur storms in and finds three of his knights also packed at they’re like “oh shoot we were gonna tell you in the morning but since you’re here, we’re resigning too”

now arthur is faced with three less knights and one less manservant than an hour ago (he has yet to find out about his sister’s fleeing). he questions them again and the room gives merlin and arthur some privacy for merlin to tell arthur that nothing is wrong but that they just need some time away. it probably won’t be permanent but they have to leave. arthur isn’t begging because kings don’t beg but he’s doing a damn good impression and merlin is on the verge of tears again and is begging arthur not to make things harder than it needs to be. arthur grows angrier now and is like “then tell me why. why are you leaving? why are my knights leaving? tell me.” and merlin can’t think of an excuse bc he doesn’t want to push his troubles of unreciprocated love onto arthur so he just stands there and arthur is like “i thought you were one of the bravest men i ever met. turns our you’re nothing more than a coward.” anyways they split on bad terms.

merlin, lancelot, gwaine, and mordred leave camelot and have their own little adventures and run into morgana again and they form their own little band of travelers. arthur, gwen, leon, elyan, and percival are still in camelot with gwen and arthur completely in the dark while the rest of the knights Know. it’s like a few months after merlin and them left and arthur and them are drunk and he brings merlin and them up and asks what happened. the knights are quiet and gwen sits up and asks elyan and her voice is desperate enough that elyan breaks and goes “morgana and lancelot were in love with you” and they all just stare at each other and elyan rushes to fill the silence with stuff like how they wanted gwen to be happy but couldn’t bear watching gwen and arthur be so in love all the time, he explains that morgana left on her own but lancelot followed merlin. arthur asks if merlin was in love with gwen too and the knights shift before percival goes “no, he was in love with you” and leon sighs before explaining the rest.

“morgana and lancelot were in love with gwen while merlin was in love with arthur. morgana left on her own and merlin was influenced by her choice to leave and lancelot and gwaine followed him. mordred followed both morgana and merlin, i’m not sure what he would’ve done had merlin stayed and morgana left. gwaine followed merlin bc he’s in love with him.” he rubs his eye bc he can’t believe the mess things are even though it’s been this way for years “morgana couldn’t stand it. lancelot was loyal to merlin. gwaine was loyal to merlin. mordred was loyal to merlin and morgana. and merlin…merlin has been protecting you for years, arthur. he’s charged into battle against the threats you can’t see, the ones in the shadows. i’ve kept an eye on him since he got here but he’s had it handled. but recently, after your wedding, he grew reckless. he came back from every fight beaten like a pulp. he stopped trying. not to let you die, but to let them get the upper hand over him. he was dancing with death. it wasn’t healthy for any of them. that’s why they left.”

the knights leave arthur and gwen in their chambers to stew in silence, drunk and guilty and missing their friends and wondering how they could’ve missed the signs. merlin and them on the other hand are traveling from town to town, village to village, kingdom to kingdom and protecting villages from raiders, protecting druids from raids, stepping in on executions and freeing sorcerers.